Beauty Pageant X

A Story by Abishai100

A special women's beauty pageant is organized on the space-station Xavier which houses survivors of Earth, but an alien intelligence seeks to tickle.

Actually folks, I'm signing off with another Alien fan-fiction, but this spin-off focuses on the logic of human social activity and explores the species dioramas of the traditional women's beauty pageant! Thanks for reading (signing off),

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In the year 2090, the US space-station Xavier was hosting a special beauty pageant, featuring the most attractive human women from various ethnic backgrounds. Earth was now gone, but Xavier was host to a colony of human survivors that wanted to endure through this millennial tribulation. This pageant was called Beauty Pageant X and was hosted and endorsed by the Weyland Corporation. It would honor the rich history of American beauty pageants on Earth from the 20th Century.

There were many worthy contenders for the first title of Miss Beauty Pageant X, and audiences cheered for Miss Virginia and Miss Ireland to win the title in this inception year on the space-station Xavier. The winner would receive a vintage oriental hand-fan, crafted by an artisan on the human space colony on Xavier. This first beauty pageant would signify a species investment in enduring traditions of peaceful competition and ornamented beauty and vanities representative of social customs and etiquette. After all, why should an extinction threat to humanity signal the end of celebrated democratic customs?

As the Beauty Pageant X was being organized for its inception-year, the pilots and engineers of the US space-station Xavier received a disturbing intelligent space signal, seemingly coming from a terrifying alien creature calling itself the Xenomorph! This 'Xenomorph' detected radio communications regarding the activity of Beauty Pageant X on space station Xavier and was intrigued to understand why this social activity would reflect 20th Century American culture activities representative of modern intellectualism and intelligence, celebrated even in American schools such as Dartmouth and Oregon. The Xenomorph wanted to dissect this Beauty Pageant X, and the Xavier engineers and pilots wondered if this terrifying super-intelligent alien simply wanted to create raw paranoia.

As the Beauty Pagent X coordinators continued to plan their event, the pilots/engineers of Xavier kept the signal communique from the Xenomorph aliens a secret. They didn't want to cause panic regarding the strange interest created by the space station beauty pageant and why it drew in the focus of a rather frightening super-intelligent alien! Beauty Pageant X would go on as planned, and the pilots/engineers of Xavier would organize some orientation of defense and stance so if the aliens tried to invade Xavier, the humans would be ready to fire back with due diligence.

HUMAN: Why would you invade us during this beauty pageant?
XENOMORPH: Isn't this pageant a vanity for capitalism?
HUMAN: What does that concern you exactly?
XENOMORPH: We wish to deconstruct your species!
HUMAN: Why?
XENOMORPH: We're colonists and surgeons.
HUMAN: You're predators.
XENOMORPH: We're simply messengers of the Prince.
HUMAN: The Prince?
XENOMORPH: Yes, the Prince is a nihilist who commands us.
HUMAN: What does he command you to do?

XENOMORPH: He commands us to dissect social activity.
HUMAN: Among intelligent species in the universe?

XENOMORPH: Exactly!
HUMAN: How does he reward you for your work and invasions?

XENOMORPH: He gives us energy cubes he creates with magic!
HUMAN: Well, we all do things for reward and pleasure, eh?

XENOMORPH: That's perhaps correct.
HUMAN: Well, you have your biases and we have ours then, eh?
XENOMORPH: That's perhaps correct.
HUMAN: In that case, why don't you let us simply carry out our lives?

XENOMORPH: In peace?
HUMAN: We won't use this pageant to justify capitalism arrogance.

XENOMORPH: What about terrorism and fascism?

HUMAN: We promise not to use the pageant to justify political prestige.

The Xenomorphs agreed that the Beauty Pageant X on the US space-station Xavier would indeed be representative of peaceful and profitable social activity and not a cultivation of wild or vain capitalism ideas from old Earth! They realized the humans organizing the ornamented event on Xavier wanted to celebrate human civilization history of using social customs and activity to re-present contracts regarding beneficial contests and hospitality rituals. The Xenomorphs had no reason to invade the Weyland Corporation's Beauty Pageant X on space-station Xavier for their commanding mysterious figure who was simply named the Prince. The Xavier pilots/engineers breathed in relief, knowing their new hospitality custom on their space-station would continue to symbolize basic social freedoms.

XAVIER PILOT: If these so-called Xenomorph aliens return to once again dissect or evaluate the logic or legality of our space-station activities, we'll continue to offer our best sociological defenses regarding the contractual legitimacy of our colony's customs that represent our species focus on the inherent magic of democratic diets.

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"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)