Forsaken

 

Born.　

 

Shining above me my crucible sun,

With me from the day life had begun,

Warning me of my soul’s worst fears,

Guiding my heart, fading my tears.

 

Loved.

 

I climbed the trees that shifted life,

From white-washed purity to darkened strife

But you kept me close and far away,

teaching me lessons day by day,

Letting me slip so I could fall,

beneath this tree so dark and tall.

 

Trusted.

 

But you held me as I conquered the night,

Lifting my spirits as I fought the plight,

Nursing me and my trivial sorrow,

waking my heart for a new tomorrow.

 

Safe.

 

But yonder hills of green and lush,

A fateful sign had left me crushed,

as I saw a cloud drifting past,

Grey in color with death to cast.

So I looked to see you push it far,

But I saw nothing; I was scarred.

 

Alone.

 

Tears came pouring in my eyes,

As I sat in retrospect of this demise

Left to die on this lonely ice,

that bitterly laughs as it cuts to slice,

my brittle, broken, wandering mind

hungry for some life to find.

 

Lost.

 

I saw the dead reflection,

of a cold and broken soul,

shifting through my uneased body,

losing all control.

 

Numb.

 

I called out into the blackest grave,

Hoping for you to rise and save,

like the thousands of other times before,

when my hopes of you once were more.

 

Forsaken.

 

But still I sit for a passing light

to guide me through the darkest nights,

And tells me of my restless fate...

 

forever I will long for you,

 

                       ...forever I will wait.

Reviews

[Derek S.Keck]

Wow, I read over this three times and it still has me reflecting. What really makes great poetry is when you can write a poem that people can reflect and relate to, yet, some major element of the poem seems to be just beyond the reader’s comprehension. I completely loved this poem. You have talent!

[Cro.Seer]

No matter how much i think, I cannot find a better way to word my thoughts on this poem better than Mr. Keck here..

You really did do an amazing job on this poem, the emotion is so think that i hit my head on it as i stood up to get the printed copy off the printer. You are very talented.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

A clear prized look into the life as we know it, a well written piece, well done

[AndyJCash]

Superbly crafted, immense imagery, definitely a poem I could read a few more times if I wasn't so tired right now haha!

[☯]

A stunning poem. I felt the emotions and words flow off the screen. Your descriptions and metaphors come alive while I read. The structure, and the way you organized everything made it beautiful. Great job :)

[Francesca]

You're a really good writer!
Your flow, word choice, structure, meaning, everything is great.
I really enjoyed reading your poem :)

[Ken Yen]

forever is but a blink of the universe's eye. the tone of this work is spot on. nice job

[ब्र&#..]

i really really loved this amazing job
alltid
-Meja