"A Minuet..." Poem

T'was the day before tomorrow, the day after yesterday, but not today... not today.

"A Minuet..."

So what is it behind your eyes
that I find so... engaging.
The way you 'tease' -
the shy and subtle sideways glance -
the way your fingertips lightly
flow upon my arm as you speak
puncuating your thoughts
into my being.

...and you look into me -

not away or through.
Eyes-to-eyes -
and such soft eyes
misty magykal eyes

eyes I... get lost within and yet found
too.

I see you in the sunsets - ya know...
now. 
I do.

...and the way your head tilts - just so

and your smile...
and...

well, I'm being a bit silly I guess -
a bit over the 'edge' but...
it feels good being 'over'
and it feels good just being near,
and it feels... good
dreaming
again...

Chris

Author's Note

Say as you wish - feel free

Reviews

[x]

I like this in some ways, but it dangles over the edge of predictability, a little bit like a kid that tries to push towards the very limit of the cliff or walk on top of a wall. But when it starts to seem prosaic, you pull back and say something a little different, there's a non-awkward self-awareness about this poem.
Having seen your other work I think you can do better though. It might be personal taste, but there's a lot about 'dreaming' and 'eyes' and it doesn't make a big impact on me.

[anne p. murray- LadeeAn..]

"and the way your head tilts - just so
and your smile...
and..."

And So and So...it flows so well and stirs the emotions

[Cherrie Palmer]

...and you look into me - not away or through.... great line packs alot of power

[_mal]

Very strong and pretty, all the way through

[.n.]

What a lovely tribute. I love your description and the colloquial language you use to detail your admiration. Very sweet. Thanks for reviewing my poem, by the way. I appreciate honest critiques.

[Kat Collins]

Very romantic. I found myself smiling wistfully of an unrequited love, picturing their aqua eyes and their lopsided grin. Melted my heart a bit at the corners. Love is always a dance.

I'm jealous....

[Stonewall]

I know that feeling. I love that feeling. I haven't felt it in far too long. Nice write.