Sea of Chance

 

Cast off these bowlines that

tether us to the predictable,

hoist the sails and let them fill

with the soft breezes of chance

 

gusting across our sun-baked skin,

tussling our salt-kissed hair,

 

until we are pointed toward infinity,

our course marked by opportunities

that we have not yet allowed to slip through

the delicate spaces between our fingers,

 

and we will follow the path set by

buoys softly bouncing in the currents

that guide us past the craggy outcroppings

of missed chances, checkpoints marking

those things that we will regret more

for not having experienced, than if

we were safe within the bounds of normalcy.

 

I will stretch across the bow of our boat,

my legs dangling, feet skimming the water,

and you will kiss me with moist lips,

breathing softly into my ear, whispering

 

those words that belong only to the two of us,

those secrets that only our bodies understand.

Reviews

[A Spectacular Case]

You describe things beautifully.

[Dalaina Renee]

I love the sea. This poem makes me want to go back to Myrtle Beach!

[Don Coorough]

You level us with your clear vision of that which is only felt. You tantalize us with the dreams of future memories. You unlock expectation and release it from Pandora's Box. My my, this is impressive writing.

[Rick Puetter]

Dear Anima Inspired,

This is a lovely piece and the words paint a beautiful picture. I particularly like the opening stanza with the final two lines "hoist the sails and let them fill / with the soft breezes of chance". Very nice.

I also like the fourth stanza. I guess it's because I like a lesson in poetry and here you deliver it. The rest of the stanzas are more descriptive and mood setting. But I do have a problem. In the opening stanza the sentiment is to let the sails fill with the breezes of chance, but all of a sudden you're following a particular course with buoys. This is not the journey you first set off on. Frankly I don't know how to resolve this problem because these are my two favorite parts of the poem and unfortunately they are in disagreement. Perhaps the simplest would be to change the last word in the first stanza in some way, i.e., for "chance" substitute "life" or "change", for example. This, however, needs to be left to you to do as you see fit or to ignore my comment entirely. It is a minor complaint in an otherwise fabulous poem.

Very best regards,

Rick

[Gandré]

this is original language of love. you never fail to entertain me with your passionte lyric story... this was a wonderful dream. I liked this:
until we are pointed toward infinity,
our course marked by opportunities
that we have not yet allowed to slip through -----------there is the connection of lovers - their expectations and their ocean and sky and the universe and all proceeding like this... in all perceivable infinity. beautiful.

[[untitled]]

I really like this one, it is romantic and enchanting while at the same time being adventurous and full of wonderment for what is to come over the horizons. Of course this poem seems to advance more to the romantic, but depending on how the reader interprets it, it can go a number of directions. I pretty, fairly, certain that this is another piece that must be added to my queue of favorites!

[bob, small b. aka invs]

i love the imagery in this. beautiful writing.