~Forgiving and Forsaken~

 

“What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.”

Arthur Pike

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lights are flickering in this darkness

drowning my soul in heart-breaking dread

left choking on SCREAMS of agony, “take me instead!!!”

shrill of phone, slaughtering spiritual thread

the call…. impersonal…..cold…..

…………“your brother is dead”……………..

 

 

The earliest memory, soothing snapshot

of me holding you, tiny little angel stained

without a mother, thrust into the same devil’s domain

sharing my chains of sorrow, torturing and INHUMANE………..

yet rainbows of unconditional love exchanged

your bright light lifting, allowing exalted refuge

………….so warm and comforting in a life of pain…………

 

 

I surrender my tears and anger

letting go of resentment, hate and despair

forgiving wicked ways of the world

for blatant refusal of unanswered prayers

light may be gone, but my love I declare

………may you be at peace with the angels up there……

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

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Reviews

[Pax]

so sorry for your lost, my friend... this is such a heartfelt tribute, your love is felt through the words you've expressed here. Your love is greater than what he did in the past... with that its all that matters for him and prayers for him to be at peace with the angels up above... simply beautiful!

[AprilRN1210]

our love is greater than anything, yes.. thank you for your warm, sweet thoughts and prayers.. I appreciate it :)

[s y e]

You know how people say "there are no words?" Yeah well, you found them words and wrote them beautifully. This is beyond gorgeous, April. You've left me speechless. I adore this one.

[AprilRN1210]

thank you girl... your sweet heart always finds a way to make me smile... I struggled so much with this one, when my fuzzy head doesn't want to work.. so these came from somewhere that is full of pain in a million pieces, but I am so glad that you think it was beautiful.. that is what I wanted to do for him... I so appreciate you ma'am.. ((hugs)) to you..

[Chris]

You found the words there were no words for...

My deepest wishes for peace and soft memories dear April.

[AprilRN1210]

I tried Chris.. he deserves so much more... thank you for always being there... you always find a way to make me feel better and for that I will forever be grateful.. you are such a giving soul and a comforting voice when needed.. thank you..

[Coyote Poetry]

'shrill of phone, slaughtering spiritual thread
the call…. impersonal…..cold…..
…………“your brother is dead”
Somethings are hard to forget. The poem was powerful. Took the reader to sad and lonely places. I tell people. We must mourn for things lost. If we don't. We will mourn forever. Good song and amazing poetry my friend.
Coyote

[AprilRN1210]

as always, you are so wise and sweet my friend.. thank you...

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this is both beautiful and very sad....

you pour out emotions that just knock us off our poetic feet...

I too am sorry for your loss, April.

jacob

[AprilRN1210]

I was so worried that this would be a jumbled mess like my heart is right now, so for you to say this means a lot to me Jacob.. your support, kind words, and friendship mean so much. from the bottom of my heart, thank you...

[kublakhan27]

Sigh...I just spent fifteen minutes on a review for this piece April, and the site ate it...I feel like smashing something...and I'm too emotionally spent to attempt remembering and rewriting it all now...a lot of it we already discussed last night anyway...I'll send you a note soon ((big hugs))

[AprilRN1210]

thought that counts, right?... I know how frustrating this site can be.. no worries, Steve, I know where your heart is.. and I appreciate it... ((hugs)) back to you...

[R Smith]

I am just so sorry for your loss April, the poem is a memorial at the end though a light has left this world he will find peace in the arms of the angels up there, be strong. Bless you.

[AprilRN1210]

oh Richie, that is what I am hoping for... that is how I am comforting myself at the moment.. thank you for your time and such sweet heartfelt sentiments,, it means a lot and i appreciate it honestly...

[R Smith]

Fate permitting I hope i will always be here for you, you are such a good and true friend.

[AprilRN1210]

ditto Richie... you are dear to me...

[Frieda P]

I have chills, and my tears are crying. There are no words to articulate how affecting this is...so sorry my sweet friend that you have the need to write this one. No review, just my heart. xo

[AprilRN1210]

how about a few big hugs?.. that is honestly what I could use more than anything... didn't mean to make you cry... just my way of letting this pain out, I am sorry.. I wasn't even going to post it, but figured someone could help me fix it.. i was so frustrated cuz it seems like my brain is scattered along with my heart and won't work... your heart and sweet words mean the world to me, thank you... from the bottom of my broken one..

[Frieda P]

All the squishy hugs you need sweetie....nothing to fix, you poured your emotions out on the page, not much left to say. ♥♥

[AprilRN1210]

thank you girl... honestly...

[Lyn Anderson]

There isn't really an adequate way to express both my sorrow for you and the sheer beauty of this poem. It is beautiful, breathtaking, really, and heartbreaking, because we know it is a portrait of your suffering in the here and now. Words fail me. I hope you can feel the love and people reaching out to you. Cold and impersonal as a keyboard can be.

[AprilRN1210]

You have no idea what that means coming from you. I can't tell you how many times I tried to fix this thinking he deserves beautiful words and my brain just won't do it that my heart hurts so bad hen I open it this is what comes pouring out... I kept thinking its a jumbled mess like me and to hear you say that means something. You are always completely honest with me and I respect you for that honestly from the bottom of my heart thank you... I know I'm probably rambling and not making sense I'm sorry I just wanted u to know what your words mean to me... May use a cold keyboard to deliver but you have a warm heart.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you, I am so honoured. And I am afraid to say it, but this is probably one of the best pieces you ever wrote, if not the best, but I really wish you never wrote it, because of the reasons you had to.:)xo

[AprilRN1210]

you now have me in another puddle of tears, seriously no words to tell you how much that means to me... i write silly, superficial things all time and was so frustrated thinking, why can't i do it the one time i NEED to, that i WANT to.. you have honestly taken a small weight off my heavy heart... for that i will forever be grateful...

[Rene Salinas]

This moved me to say sorry. I do not know what you are going through and will not pretend either but it does not stop me from sending thoughts of understanding and respect as the situation seem to require it. It does make it a little more challenging to focus on the words written as I think it will maybe take from the moment itself so I will leave at that.

Warmth in thought

Thankyou

[AprilRN1210]

those warm thoughts count, Rene... you are always so eloquent, thoughtful, and genuine.. your show of support means a lot to me.. thank you sir... it is truly appreciated...

[JJHII]

I love the wording that you used in the last section. No Matter the things you experience in life good or bad and maybe even the worst, there is nothing like that last verse. I can not finish this review without saying I am sorry to hear about the loss. I do wish it was a poem about his success and not his death.

[AprilRN1210]

thank you... your kindness and support are both sweet and appreciated...