Fall

Fall

 

„Life is funny“ she thought and instantly realized how ironic this sentence sounded. Because fun was the last thing on her mind. She was standing at a window in a hospital, looking at the trees that were beginning to change their colours. Although fall was coming, it was still hot outside. A warm breeze streaked her face but she was shivering. She couldn’t get rid of this cold feeling inside of her since she has heard the diagnosis. Since that moment an unknown fear has begun to rule her life.

When her mother told her that the doctor found a lump in her breast, she completely shut down. No, not her mother. It must be innocent. She kept up that hope and didn’t allow herself any “what-ifs” in her head. Then the day came when the worst case became reality. When her mother told her about the tumour, she was really calm. They both didn’t cry. It was like if they were talking about some other people. She has never admired her mom that much as in this moment. Her mother stayed so strong. She didn’t want to ruin it by crying. But on the inside she was screaming and sobbing like a child. Her mom has cancer? HER MOM? Sure, it was all the time in the media, the statistics on women that suffer from breast cancer are enormous. But that something like that could happen in her family, to her mom was simply unbelievable.

Somehow she managed to stay strong as well. But when she went to her room, she started to cry bitterly. She couldn’t breathe. She just wanted to hide and pretend it didn’t happen. After the first shock, life was going on surprisingly normal in her family. Everyone tried to follow the routine, avoiding thinking about it. But this cold feeling never disappeared.

And now she was standing here, a couple of weeks later in the hospital. Her mom has just been operated on. A part of her was feeling like that small child again whose world has been fallen apart. But she had to be strong for her. So she turned around, squared her shoulders, went to her mother’s bed and forced herself to smile.

A smile that was saying, I am with you mom, no matter what happens. Everything is going to be alright, the tumour was out and it hasn’t spread yet. Life is funny, she thought bitterly. Before her mom got sick, she never told her she loved her. Now she was just thankful, she got the chance to make up for it…