It's Raining

Listen.

Can you hear the rain pitter pattering against the pavement?

It's tracing down the windows ...

slowly, slowly,

and then all at once a streak zipping to its death on the pane below.

 

It's hammering against my coat, cold seeping through the down, making me shiver ...

and I can't stop shaking.

It's echoing in my mind ...

endlessly ...

d

  r

    i

      p

 

 

      d

    r

  o

p

 

 

d

  r

    i

      p

 

 

      d

    r

  o

p

 

Make it stop.

 

It's beautiful at the same time it's not.

It's hurting my ears at the same time it's comforting my soul.

It's washing away my tears and creating them at the same time.

 

It's raining outside today ...

 

It's raining inside today.

Reviews

[Robert Luna]

I personally love the rain. It is one of the only times I truly sleep well. not sure if it is the hypnotic thumps or knowing that the earth is in a way bathing to become refreshed and anew for us all to witness new world the next day.

This was perfectly flowing and a deep underlying life of it own. I really enjoyed this piece alot.


Great Job!!!!

[Josh Clifton]

Wonderful Dualism with the inside and out factor. I also like how you play on the benefits and problems the rain proposes to you. Wonderful descriptiveness with great imagery. Good job.

[Brianna Brie]

Amazing the way you captured the rain and its ability to bring out all of these feelings. Job well done!

[Charlotte Rose]

This is a very beautiful write.. I really love the rain.. GREAT WRITE.. The flow is beautifully done. and they way you get the good and the bad of rain it amazing. GREAT!!

[Andromeda]

i love how it's raining both inside and out--that idea is perfect. great poem!

[Vera Iconica]

I really like this poem. You really capture the two faced side of rain, if that even makes sense. Well done.

[Gordon Greene]

I love this picture you took! And I thank you for letting us look through your photo book.

Beautiful images... your poem is what life is... beautiful and sad all at once.

I really very much enjoyed this read.

Gordon

[Stiver]

Dezaraye,

I love this poem. And what I love mosty is the sound of the piece. Pitter, Patter, Zipping, Hammering, echoing...

And I love the images that you create. I could practically see that litte raindrop zipping down the window!!!!

I also liked the tone of this piece. The poem creates sort of a melancholy feel. But the coolest part is the transition of spirit from "Hey, it's raining, and I think that's cool" to an undersanding that "crap, I forgot that the rain makes me wet. Now I want it to stop, Please!!"

Very nice write, Dezaraye.

[JMariah]

I too love the rain. And I love the emotions and images it evokes. I like the contrast of the rain being inside and outside in this poem. I have to mention though, that I found the ending a little too wordy, which seemed to weaken the poem for me. For example in the line "It's beautiful at the same time it's not", the words "at the same time" seem redundant. The line would read more powerfully as "It's beautiful, it's not". I thought the same of the two lines that follow this one.
Then the last two lines didn't seem to need the word "today" (as they are written in the present tense). Writing them like this:
It's raining outside.
It's raining inside.
would seem to put the emphasis back on the outside/inside concept and take the focus off of the fact that it's happening today. My favourite lines are:

"It's echoing in my mind ...
Endlessly ...
drip drop drip drop.

Make it stop."

This was gripping and powerful! Well done.

[All faded blue]

Sometimes it rains. I don't much care for rain. The grey skies, and muck underfoot, and tracking in on the dog's feet. However, occaisionally it is nice to hear it on the roof, and of course if one is already crying, it is a good cover, who can tell tears from the raindrops on your face??

[John Stussy]

Strange, what an impact the rain can have on us? It enhances our moods, serves to either comfort us more when we are relaxed, or in this case, amplify pain we feel. Reminds me of how I felt at my dad;s funeral. It rained that day.