someone read this

I need a bio for a children's book, please help!!!!!

Cherrie lives in the SW corner of Arkansas where they have a horse ranch/ arena. They hold team roping’s on Friday nights. At the present she works for Sager Creek in their accounts payable department. She is a published poet and is under contract to publish a children’s story book. Cherrie’s own grandmother was a beautiful storyteller, and like her own grandmother Cherrie delights in spinning a yarn for her family, and it is her hope you delight in reading them to yours.

 

Reviews

[Gomer LePoet]

I too agree very strongly with Esana's thoughts.

[Ed Hart]

Esana Bridges left an excellent response to your request...good luck Cherrie

[Esana Bridges]

It's a good bio. However, most bios published in books are written in third person, so unless you're supposed to write it in first person, consider changing that. Also, consider the use of more paragraphs to make it easier to read, especially for children, who I don't think can concentrate on such a large block of text.

Your last few lines about being a grandma are touching. Consider a new paragraph and using the word "Currently" instead of "Now " (for "Now I'm a grandma). The part about loving God seems a bit random, so consider relocating it before the grandma part, so you can connect the grandmother parts.

Also, the part where you say "My own grandmother was a beautiful storyteller, and I delight in spinning a yarn for mine" is a bit confusing because you reference your grandchildren in the second part, but there's no direct noun to connect that to in the first part. Consider. "My own grandmother created beautiful stories for me and her other grandchildren, and I delight in spinning a yarn for mine. I hope you delight in reading them as well." (Also consider splitting up that sentence as it is quite long.)

I hope this was useful to you!

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

Sounds like a full filled life! Do a chilrens book about ranch life! All children love horses and any kind of animal!