An apology, my Love.

It's a constant reminder of you, my Love,

The words you wrote all those years ago.

It's a constant pain in my chest, my Love,

Waiting to hear your name or voice again.

The mistakes made were all mine, my Love,

and it pains me when you caught the crossfire.

You're right about the absence felt,

But the sun that left my life was you.

Reviews

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Roy! : )
It's just Richard, come to review one of your fine efforts.

As you know from reviewing my Free Verse poem, "Beside the pond", it can be a powerful form when written and presented properly, or it can take-on a "talking" sort of feel when presented in simple sentences.

For instance, I, as any reader with any real depth, can certainly ascertain from the title alone that this poem contains emotion and a scenario where the heart and deep feeling are probably going to be encountered and related to, but what will make it special, allow the reader to sit-up and really take notice?
You've heard the saying, "it's not WHAT you say, but HOW you say it that matters!" The same thing applies to poetry, and because we are visual people, too, that what we perceive with the eye effects the mind's-eye, our feelings, our impression, how and what we think and feel, "presentation" (the manner in which our work is displayed) effects the smoothness with which it reads. The very heart and soul of any poem depends on it for that extra special punch our poetry deserves.
Thus, poetry is not just about words, but how they are arranged, punctuation, well-placed line-breaks, where verses are divided, etc; there is much to composing and sharing many never learn or realize they should. Does it take extra effort? perhaps, but mote than that it requires knowledge first, understanding secondly, practice with that knowledge and proper understanding, before one's skills are developed to their highest natural potential … that is to say, "Before they can compose great poetry naturally, without undue effort, much the same as learning to properly play the guitar, golf, or to develop any worthwhile skill.
Here, Roy, let me illustrate with this excellent example your poem has furnished:

... . ... . ... . ... . ... . ... . ...

Apology, My Love …

It's a
constant reminder
of You,
My Love.

Words
you wrote …
all those years ago;

constant pain
in my chest,
My Love,
waiting …
to hear
your name,
your voice again.

Mistakes made
were all mine,
My Love.

It pained me
when you
caught
the crossfire.

You're right
about how
absence felt;

but,
the sun
that left my life …

was You.

... . ... . ... . ... . ... . ... . ...

Roy, as you can see, there is very little editing of your wording to set this splendid Free Verse piece into motion, to make it open-up and breathe, to free it to dance upon the page.
A size larger font, one with serifs (perhaps), italicized, and a softer color would go a long way toward appeasing the mind's-eye, the heart, and soul of your growing ardent fandom.

Ah, well … whatever, I love it, because it definitely caught my attention enough to give it its due attention in helping turn into the virtual little, well-struck masterpiece of poignant romance I believe it deserves to be.

Thank you you ever-so gratefully for sharing your skills and for the opportunity to gift a full review, My Friend … many grateful blessings! ⁓ Richard

[=]

Hello again, friend! Thank you for your review.

Admittedly, I did originally write this poem in a similar format to how you did in your review. For me personally, I felt it flowed to slow. But I guess that's why you're the teacher and not me, haha!

In any regard, thank you for your words!

- Roy

[Richard🖌]

Roy,
Such a poem of deep emotion and heartfelt angst should never be sped through, but each moment allowed to linger and penetrate the reader's own ability to relate, and to be something meaningful, rather just another interlude to read and forgotten.

Yes, I takes both writer and teacher to produce impacting poetry, whether that teacher may be the influences of other's compositions, reading about technique, or by whatever means one is inspired to follow their aims … I hope "something" I've offered might be useful to you! ⁓ RJ

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest, powerful and true words for love lost and missed.
"You're right about the absence felt,
But the sun that left my life was you."
Regret keep us honest. Thank you Roy for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[William Liston]

This is a very good poem. There is strong feeling of regret and misfortune throughout this piece, and it reaches its peak in the last line. This is very well written. I hope to read more from you soon.

-William Liston