Spirit of Eternity -

 

What is this pain and suffering that I feel inside? Every moment, every turn, every second, every song reminds me of you and tortures my mind constantly. I need you more than life itself; for you are my life, without you I am nothing, I am empty.

I have become a faceless void in this barren desert, for everything has wilted to the touch of my hand for life itself has left me and my soul longs for the cool water of your touch to quench this thirst inside me. Every waking moment, every dream I dream, you are there. Just out of my reach always there like a ghost that torments my mind constantly. I look upon your picture and I see the beauty in your smile and the sparkle in your eyes, for the light in mine has faded as life itself fades from me. My spirit is dieing, a slow and painful degeneration of my soul continues, begging for renewal that only can be saved by your love.

Why must I feel this way? For it makes no sense yet is completely sensible at the same time. How can this be? How can two spirits that are tied so deeply together are pushed so far apart by the distance that exists between us? I fear losing you more than I fear losing my life, for to lose you I lose my life for you have become my life my sole reason for living. It is this fear that wakes me in the night shaking, sweating, and gasping for air as though I was on the brink of death itself, yet was not taken. Why has my heart betrayed me this way, for I do not know the reason for this love? To many this love would not survive the rigors and perils that it must go through, but yet somehow has held itself together for some unknown reason, though our spirits know each other and by some strange twist of fate are joined to each other without us knowing, yet it keeps us going and living on.

For it is this joining of our souls that keeps pulling at us, drawing us closer together, struggling and fighting to preserve that which has been ordained by the heavens. My love grows each day that passes and I continually long for you and look towards the day that which our souls, spirits, bodies and lives are eternally joined before the Lord of the Heavens, to which we pledge ourselves to each other and to the Lord of Heaven. My heart longs for this day and yearns to be near you and my spirit looks to the winds and the sky waiting, longing for you to return to me and never to leave again.