Just a Dream

 

Can you hear me

As I whisper your name?

Across the ocean

It travels in vain.

 

Can you see me

As I stretch out my hand?

Across the miles

To a distant land.

 

Can you feel me

As I caress your cheek?

Across my mind

It’s you that I seek.

 

Can you love me

As I draw you near?           

Or was it just a dream?

You were never really here.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Adrian K. Smith]

I think the fourth stanza poses the most intriguing question, in the sense that the Love itself is what may have been the dream - while the rest - was reality. Yes, I know I tend to charge out to left field sometimes; but you could be standing right next to the person and wonder if the emotions were a dream...

[lauren emily]

This is really happy and really sad at the same time, and that's what makes it really great.
"Can you see me
As I stretch out my hand?
Across the miles
To a distant land..."
I love that part! It's really beautiful and heartfelt. Well-heck! The whole poem is!
Great work my friend,
~Lauren

[Arthur Henn]

OK, again gang, this is just me....LOL
nothing going on between this wonderful soul of a woman and I
But i write in a style of romanticism and this is what her wonderful
words of poetry inspired my heart to reflect upon and write.
__________________________________________________________________

The tenderness of your sweet embrace
Is heard through the melodies
Through the softness of your voice

Yes, not only can he feel you
With open arms
He can see your wide open smile

He holds you upon open sails
Blowing in the open seas
A caress of warmth and love
He never lets go of

Drawing each other closer together
The dream with in dreams
Ever so close
Feeling the motions of love

Startled and vain
You wake
To the oceans breeze
Lying beside you
Etched within the folds of
Soft cotton sheets
A note of love
Saying thank you for
The dreams you share

Arthur Henn

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

You just draw your reader right on in. I felt so much love and passion in this write.

From these first few lines, they are so strong and heart stopping.

Can you hear me
As I whisper your name?
Across the ocean
It travels in vain.




Across the ocean in vain. Excellent.

Then you bring it all together and question the reality of this love with these wonderful words to leave the reader, is it, was it real or what.

Can you love me
As I pull you near?
Or was it just a dream?
You were never really here

Nice, Dani, we are never really sure about our love, are we?

[emmajoy]

This is beautiful, not least because apart from this or that, I wish I could have written it for someone I know.

The words, the phrasing, the emotions expressed are just perfect. Perfect.

[Angel's Lady]

I love how you start each verse with a question...nicely written. Very beautiful, too.
Wonderful job!

[Seriana]

No way!!! Girl, my eyes are watering.....this is wonderful. And sad, because it's that love one can never have. Wondering if we dreamt them all along....to feel the reality of them, we might never know.
Beautiful write. :)

[Marie]

Nicely penned, my friend. Nicely penned.

[Tony Hwilka]

A very nice poem, good writing.

Tony