Chapter 21: Danny

Chapter 21

Danny

I open the boot of the car. It's too small for everything we need so, there will have to be some kind of compromise. I chuck mine and Lex's bags in the boot and retreat. Jason comes out, holding a box of supplies. I offer to take the box but he just gives me a look, like I'm the s**t on his f***ing shoe. The only reason I don't go for him is because I'd get another lecture from Elektra. Even if I'm provoked, I'm always the one in the wrong. If I wasn't in love with the girl, I wouldn't care. I care about her and she cares about him, so by extension I should at least be somewhat cordial. Ugh, it's painful being nice to him. I have my ways of getting to him; I can't go for him but it goes both ways. He can't go for me.

He walks over to his car and puts the box on the back seat. Would it have been so difficult to just hand it to me? I pick a box up that has been left on the front door steps. Our food box. I slide that into the boot and close it. I rest against the boot and stare at the door. I'm so ready to be gone at this point. I don't believe there is any safe zone out there. They would've found us more recently. We wouldn't of just have one visit in five years or so; they would've found us again as they promised. I just want to go somewhere with medicine and food. Considering the influx of babies recently, we all need somewhere to settle.

I'd planned to leave before Lex and the lackey appeared; Sam and I had planned to get out of dodge and find other people but we never got the chance. Our relationship was complex but I would've done everything for that woman. We were made for each other; I saved her from the dangers around us and she saved my mind. Plus, the sex was dumbfounding. I can't help but feel that Lex and I both settled for each other. Physical attachment instead of companionship. A caprice. Yeah, she's attractive and intelligent and funny but I don't want those things. I want my soul-mate, but she's dead. Although we're of a similar mind, the only thing of hers that I'm really interested is her vagina. Might as well be honest with myself.

Elektra walks out, two bags on her back and a fair sized plastic box. I rush over to her and take a bag and the box. She whispers words of thanks and then walks over to Jason's car. She places the bag in the boot of that car and then she pauses, taking a hold of Jason's arm. They seem to be in the middle of an in-depth conversation, as they usually are. Whenever I encounter them, they always seem to be fixated by some obviously substantial topic. I should be jealous but no, I'm alright with it for the most part. I'll just interrupt if I'm bored and want to get a reaction out of him. Small pleasures, small pleasure.

“You want to drive? Or shall I?” Lucas asks, holding another box of stuff. I slowly move my eyes over to him and lick my teeth. He knows I don't know how to drive; why would he ask if not just to annoy me?

“No, you're alright. You drive, I'll sit in the back.” Lucas smiles and punches my arm. Next time he touches my arm, I will break his fingers. I've done it before; he put his hand on my shoulder so I broke his wrist and most of the bones in his fingers.

“Great. There's another box just inside the front door.”

I walk through the front door and I pick up the box. Helene is standing, looking completely perplexed. She has Sophia in her arms.

“Helene? You alright?” I ask.

“How did I get here? I was by a lake and now, I'm here. How did I get here?”

“Helene, we haven't been near a lake for a good few months. The last lake we stopped at was the Rhine. Are you alright?”

“No, no we were just there. Someone has left their child; I found her crawling by herself,” she mutters, rambling. I put my hand on her arm. Her memory comes and goes too much. She doesn't recognise her own daughter. It's always the same, after she has her seizures.

“She's your daughter, Hel. It's alright, you must have hit your head. Sophia's your daughter,” I reassure. She looks at Sophia and then at me and repeats several times. She bursts into tears, heaving sobs. That sets Sophia off too as it usually does; the connection between parents and kids expands to emotions. Helene puts Sophia on the floor and continues to sob; I pull her into my arms and she cries into my shoulder. I kiss the top of her head.

“Sh, sh. It's all right. Everything is all right, everything's okay.” She moves backwards and looks up at me.

This reminds me of a time long ago. When we were younger and she was weaker. When we saved her, I took her out of there and tried to comfort her. Her bright cobalt blue eyes swimming with tears. I held her like someone would hold a child. I'd never loved anyone more than I loved her. Her elven features. Her fiery red hair that went down to her waist. I've never forgiven him for stealing her away from me; I never will, especially looking at what his love has done to her. Left her weak and pathetic. There isn't anything that can be done to fix her, after everything that she has been put through without her consent.

I put my hands on her cheeks and stare into her eyes. One of her pupils seems larger than the other, not worryingly though. It's become a feature. I can smell her rose scented lip balm. I kiss her forehead breathing in the mint of her hair. Her eyes go from my eyes to my lips. I press my lips to hers, hungry for the taste of her. The taste of all of her. She pushes against my force, making herself dominant. I move my hands down to the curve of the small of her back, drawing her closer to me. She opens her mouth and caresses her tongue against mine. I breathe heavily, groaning as I go for air. I push her back and she sits on the chest of drawers, dragging me with her. We continue to kiss, our lips pressing against each other, following the flow. We don't have long left so I have to get everything out of my system. I move one hand down, feeling every curve of her body. She groans in excitement. I move my hand underneath her waistband, heading towards her knickers. She moves my hand down to the spot and she groans. I keep doing what I know how to do. She throws her head back and groans.

“Mummy?”

S**t. Alfie. Didn't consider the kid. I remove my hand from his mother's clitoris and back away. I look back, Helene is smiling as she clears her throat. What was I in here for? Yeah, the box. I pick up the box and back into the door. I place the box in the boot of the car and open the back door. I allow myself to breathe and smile. I just finger f***ed his wife and she was begging me for it. I'm going to be in a car with the both of them and Lucas doesn't know anything.

I look out of my window and watch Elektra; she's standing, looking at her bump. I want to feel guilty but she feels the same way about me.

It isn't love between us, not even affection. It's...it's, I don't even know.