Learn to Behave Yourself

How lovely is our time of austerity

That we wait for destiny

Like a laid-off husband, or a pregnant wife

 

These are the years we

Learn to behave ourselves

In a country filled with accusations

 

Of our virtues, of our losses

The jazz of grief is undeniable

An edition of longing signed & numbered

 

Are we the author of our fates truly?

The hand that sports Mondays & supplements?

I'm going to order another mug of Salvation's army

 

How lovely are our visits with destiny

So fine to write on napkins and presume

The waiter of time would bring you

 

The hidden messages, inscribed there

As the teaching of bad words to parrots

That I call foolish infatuation, the weight of dawn

 

How could you ever  understand me

Without being a writer, without the love-affair

Of districts of art prohibited to the gypsies even

Or the ballads of sacrifice dictated by loneliness. 

Reviews

[Kristallo]

"The Jazz of grief is undeniable." Loved that line. Also the stanza:

How lovely are our visits with destiny
So fine to write on napkins and presume
The waiter of time would bring you

That's ingenious. I am so in love with your writing, you have a delicate touch, filled with wisdom, prophesy, emotional gravity with notes of sublime self actualization and hints of isolation. It's all wonderful. You have such a gift, and I am ever in awe of it. Great write, Eloha. Well done.

[Eloha]

Well it's very touching that you are moved by these lines.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I'm completely in love with the last stanza of this one...so absolutely poetically perfect. The words just melt in your mouth like sugar; delicious.

As for the rest of the piece...extremely strong start and extremely poignant ending; the middle lost me a little. I wasn't as in love with stanzas 5 and 6 for some reason, the flow is just a little off for me. Otherwise, you always have that delicate and get slightly impetuous nature to your writing that makes me smile and my inner muse swoon, so bravo for that.

[Eloha]

Yes it's not a polished piece exactly. Why do you like the last stanza so much, maybe you can relate?

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

That's probably the main reason...I often feel misunderstood by the majority of people in my life. I use words that are too "big" in normal conversation, I often speak in a "poetic tone" when talking with friends or family; people think I'm strange, but in reality it is just that I see poetry in everything, and it's hard to shut it off.

[Eloha]

Why do you feel misunderstood? You seem like a really accessible person. To speak in a poetic tone is darling! Well I'm sure the horses don't fault you for it.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Horses understand me, it's the people I have trouble with :) Here I am making myself seem strange. Look at it this way...if we were at a party, you would see me across the room and I could charm the pants off of you, but inside I would be terrified the entire time. That's me...outwardly charming, accesible, witty, funny when i should be, etc., on the inside, a little less confident than I should be. My mother put me into beauty pagents when I was younger, so I learned how to "be", and I did it well, but I hated every second of it.