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Reviews

[Creepy Swine Guy]

Disclaimer - Look. This crit doesn't come from a book critic or an editor or even a guy who ever got an "A" in English. So if my crit isn't as glowing as you would hope, you would be well within your rights (and probably correct) in saying "What the heck does that snook know? He's no expert." I can occasionally be helpful by finding typos for you or that one sentence that doesn't read quite right. But please take my crit for what it is ... just one guys opinion.

Spelling & Grammar Nitpicks:
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In, "There is a small girl, six or seven only, who is ..." I'm feeling like it would read better if it said, "There is a small girl, only six or seven, who is ..."

General Impressions:
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You have a keen eye for detail and you convey those details in sharp focus with your writing. I tend to be skeptical that a good story can be told in a piece as short as this one. But you pulled it off beautifully. I was breathing a sigh of relief until the very end when you casually hit me in the breadbasket.

[Solst Rapture]

A breath of fresh air. I am quickly becoming a fan of yours.

[Crysta Blade]

Oh wow...........*stunned silence*

So....so....so sad.........*gasp**gasp* I don't know what to say.......oh...wow.....

[Emcee Blood-stained Car..]

I liked this picture of a game of dodgeball-turned-dodgecar, the idyllic imagery of the suburbs, and the jolting end.

There are a few minor spelling faults though, which you might be aware of and might not care, but just in case:

"angle-blond" should be "angel-blonde"

"cars" should be "car's"

"to late?" should be "too late?"

Otherwise, I think your diction is creative and description enthralling. Such as describing the lawn in the first paragraph as "manicured." I like that, even though I can't remember if it's called an idiom or an epithet or whatever. Hope this review helps. I'm looking forward to reading more your stories.