The Mourning Maiden

I wrote this for a friend who has been going through some serious trials, to remind her that there is always hope.

The Mourning Maiden

The light shimmered on the lake

The stars and the setting sun

A mourner stood upon the beach

And her tears fell one by one

Dawn is far away 

But approaching far too quickly 

Ever since she was a child

All that's good looked sickly

Now the sun has sunk completely

Her role model - subject to none

Now that she has time to ponder

How her tears fall one by one

Things that sober up the mind

Things that make grown men cry

She is not afraid to ask the questions

She's not afraid of saying "why?"

But she halters and she falters 

Filled with guilt - "what have I done?"

Her eyes burn with the pent up grieving

And her tears fall one by one

Daily watching the horizon

Every morning for a ship

Anything to bring her hope 

She waits and mourns 'til she feels sick

What is the maiden waiting for?

Who is it she longs to come?

Her heart is aching, mourning to morning 

And her tears fall one by one

 

Upon the waters, now dawn has brought

With it ships of diverse array

The maiden's hope begins to rise

Until the soldiers take her away

Away from the beach where she is waiting

Away from the dawn and rising sun

Alone again in a prison cell

And her tears fall one by one

The light that shines through the prison bars

The bright light which once was clean

With darkness filling every corner

The light takes on a deadly gleam  

Fascinated by her aching 

She feels like the only one

To be severed from affection

And her tears fall one by one

Her love has yet to come for her 

Her savior who is dear

The only lover that she's had

The one who yearns to hold her tears

Then Blood runs through the ceiling

Fills the cell, sparkling in the sun

The blood is ransom for her freedom

How her tears fall one by one!

Her lover now has come for her

And now her tears mix with the flood

His life has purchased her salvation 

Her atonement through his blood 

The executioner has killed him

The axe fell heavily to the drum

The beat governed the merciless slaughter 

The maiden's tears fell one by one

Engrossed, enraged, entrapped, ensnared 

Tricked by the soldiers, left to die

She lay covered in blood and hopeless

'Til all that remained to do was cry 

Alas! The soldiers were betrayers 

But they foolishly thought they won

And the savior who was slaughtered 

Felt the tears drop one by one

Soldiers flung, destroyed and slaughtered

Feel the judgement and the rage

Killing those who are immortal

Is like putting a child in a lion's cage

Now the blood that sprays the ground

And the slick stickiness that runs

Is the enemies thoroughly vanquished 

The tears dry slowly, one by one

Away, away, the Maiden taken

To the cliffs to feel the breeze

Rescued from the darkest dungeon

Now she again beholds the seas  

A light shimmers on the lake

The stars and the setting sun

A maiden stands with her lover

Her tears of joy fall one by one

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

A sad and wild ride in the poem. The strong description took me to places of sadness and create visions of great pain. I did like the positive ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Gurglesnarch van Caasi]

Thank you for the honorable review! I am happy you enjoyed it :)

[Gleb Zavlanov]

Beautiful, with a very graceful flow. The repitition of 'one by one' only beautified the effect. Very nicely done!
I think that in 'She waits and mourns 'til she feels sick,' 'til should be 'till.

Everything else was great...and powerful! :)

[Gurglesnarch van Caasi]

I am very thankful for your kind review!
Also, I thought the same, but then I realized that "till" means to dig such as tilling in the garden, whereas "until", the word "'til" comes from has only one "l". Therefore since the apostrophe shows where letters have been taken off, 'til would be proper.
Thank you again for the kind words!

[Gleb Zavlanov]

Thank you for notifying me of such information. And you're welcome. :)

[Gurglesnarch van Caasi]

Of course :)

[Sami Khalil]

"Away, away, the Maiden taken

To the cliffs to feel the breeze

Rescued from the darkest dungeon

Now she again beholds the seas"

[Sami Khalil]

A sad and emotive poem. A splendid one...:)....................

[Gurglesnarch van Caasi]

Thank you very much :)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)...................