My final breath, a sigh

Accepting the inevitable

I had neither time nor patience
and this I so relayed,
annoyance being the tone I used
but still the stranger stayed.

I bid him sit if stay he must
offering him a chair,
this he declined without a word
but with a steely glare.

That chilled my bones to marrows core
withering my very soul,
a shadow crossing o'er my heart
a shadow black as coal.

It was then I knew my time was his
he'd called to still the hands,
to lead me from this mortal coil
and to the promised lands.

So silently I left with him
my final breath a sigh,
of sadness that my life was done
and this my time to die...

Reviews

[SJ Mullins]

Excellent rhythm and rhyme. Loved the ending. Well done!~

[Gee]

Thank you kindly

[SJ Mullins]

You're welcome! :)

[Norman 223]

Your description of the Grim Reaper as a guest was chilling, yet the finale still managed to convey a sense of hope that although inevitable, was not fearful.
An unusual twist in a stylish piece of writing.

[Gee]

Again thank you Norman

[Ruth]

Oh goodness, I really didn't expect the finale here...moved my soul deeply...a beautiful tone to this piece Gee and so visual :)

[Gee]

Thank you Poppy, your words are appreciated greatly

[Ruth]

My pleasure Gee :)

[Miss Sharon]

Very well written with perfect rhyme and meter. A good read.

[Gee]

Thank you Miss S

[Teddybearlee]

Very well done, my cup of tea, thank you for commenting on mine so I would discover your writings, "It was then I knew my time was his, " that one line definitely was attention grabbing to me, really pulled it all together.

[Damon Chambers]

Actual goosebumps while reading this, as it seems I have thought of the end being exactly the same.

[Gee]

Spooky eh, thanks

[Shabeeh Haider]

Death is so certain but still we live life as if we will be here forever. A wonderful poem with excellent rhyme and rhythm

[Gee]

Thank you for your kind words

[Sheila Kline]

We are born to die, just no way of getting away from it. You convey to us the reality that we have little say in it, unless we are just stupid and bring it on by our ill planned actions. It is then we gamble with life and lose the game. Your rhyme and rhythm are excellent.

[Gee]

Thank you Sheila

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest and good words. I liked how you led to the good ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Gee]

Cheers , thanks for reviewing

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Ardra]

i loved the way you have created this story ...
the day death would visit would we be prepared.. not at all ... we all live as if there is always a tomorrow... what is tomorrow never comes ... hehe i just wish he is handsome reaper :P not the boney and scary one... death should be a pleasant one ... maybe like in sleep... not troubling anyone else..

[Gee]

Thank you for your fun review

[Ardra]

i enjoyed reviewing it :)