Ice

Ice

A Poem by Heart of gold
"

Needs a lot of work and adding to it just a draft for now

"
I feel the cold on the highest peaks
Ice wrapped around my frozen heart
Stone cold eyes gazing
I find myself gazing at you
Your warmth begins to surround me
Like an open fire on a winter night

© 2015 Heart of gold


Author's Note

Heart of gold
Just a draft needs adding to... Any suggestions?

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Reviews

Beautifully captured essence of what someone means to you. I think the last line is fine, but it always helps to look at it with fresh eyes after a day or two.


Posted 8 Years Ago


Heart of gold

8 Years Ago

Thank you very much
Yes I wasn't sure about the last line either , thanks for the review much appreciated

Posted 8 Years Ago


This is a fine write, true and honest feelings in every line.

I suggest a small editing to the last line : "Like an open fire on a winter's night" it is up to you, i may be wrong suggesting that ^_^

Posted 8 Years Ago



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120 Views
3 Reviews
Rating
Added on October 10, 2015
Last Updated on October 10, 2015
Tags: Heart, cold, winter

Author

Heart of gold
Heart of gold

United Kingdom



About
Student nurse Writing to purely express myself like many others Keen traveller 🌎🌏 The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others 🌹 more..

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