Chapter 1

Society teaches all of the boys and girls in the world to be a perfect, good straight boy or girl. I mean it’s not like there is anything wrong with it, but then you get the children that fall out of the category. It doesn’t mean that they are necessarily gay, but they can be anything but just liking the opposite gender. They may like the same gender and the opposite gender. They may like people of all genders.

But face it...society doesn’t want these “freaks” as many people call us. Yes us. I am one of the people who aren’t the factory issued perfect, jock, straight as an arrow teenage boy. I am a perfect boy in my own way and I will blaze a path that will forever rest in the books of someone, somewhere. I just want to know that I mattered to someone, at some point in time. Isn’t that what we all want?

My school, which is in the rural golden hills of Nebraska, holds a standard for the gay and lesbian students that attend. Our standard for all schoolwork and athletic participation and well generally everything, is just the same as everyone in the building who is straight. I know that our lives would not be the same were it not for this rule. You will never see a gay or lesbian student being picked on by a straight student. We stand together as one big “family”. We’re all a “Penguin”- a silver and black colored penguin.

Well my name is Cashel Bell. Many of my friends call me Cash- kinda like the money, but totally not like the money for I don’t remember turning green at some point in time.   I guess I should explain more about myself but now is not the time. I just want to be able to stand in a crowd and tell them that I am gay without being shunned from the society I hide from.

I hide behind  the fake images that the strangers around me see. When I am around the people I know, I let my true self shine brightly. I don’t want to be known as the person who is “two-faced” because I don’t know what to show to everyone. I want to be known as the person who is not afraid to show who he is. I just don’t want to be called the “Gay boy” who should get out of our town.

I know my boyfriend- Aiden-, and my friends- Rosey, Phoenix, and Jo- want to be able to feel the same way. I know we all have the same person who is the sworn enemy, simply because we are not straight. Her name is Victoria. She is blind, but that doesn’t stop her from being one of the worst bullies in the entire school- mostly towards that students who are Bi, Gay, or Lesbian. She is one who can put on a double face-  to be the bully and then be the one who wants to prevent all bullying in the school. I hate her mostly because the school officials don’t see how fake she is.

Victoria Leslie Gyles. This one girl who can only be the sworn enemy my friends and I, for she only torments us. We hate her, but we can not do anything to stop it, for it would look worse if we responded to the bullying. We can’t report it, and we can’t even stop it. We can’t lay a hand on her, or she will scream bullying just because she a is a blind girl. I hate it, but I have grown to accept that the only time I can get away from her bullying is when I am at home, or whenever we are away from school. Even then, it is hard to hide from her. I just wish she would stop and “see” what she is doing wrong. One day this bullying will come back to bite her in the butt.