i love the poem, but i have to disagree that there are no discernible technical problems.. you capture the feeling that the reader desires, however, there are grammatical errors throughout that almost obfuscate what you are trying to say, i dont want to sound negative at all, because i love this, but.. here is what i am trying to say, i will redo it but you dont have to change a thing if you dont want to (:
You kissed me, while my eyes were closed.
You held me, and we were fully clothed.
You touched me, while our feelings grow
You loved me, when you felt it to be right.
You chose me; and said "it was love at first sight."
You protected me, in my darkest fright.
just my opinion lol, and trust me my opinion does not mean too much (: again i loved it! -s
Short and sweet. I liked the flow the "You-" kept up. "You protected me, when I was caused a fright." This one sentence to me didn't make sense, but I still got the gist of it, which was good enough.