I Miss You

A Story by Keola

There are some things you can never let go.

I saw her last night. It’s been awhile since the last time we talked, but her face was forever imprinted in the back of my mind. It caught me a bit off guard to tell the truth. It was something only the streets of Hollywood could produce. Her brown curly hair flew effortlessly in the night breeze. Hazel eyes taking full control, making me give into her every word. A smile that was the north star of my world lighting up all to see. She had on her favorite hoodie. A simple pink Hollister hoodie. It was the same hoodie she wore when we first met, eventually wearing it every time I came over, and a pair of jeans that was just not any old pair. She wore those the night we both knew there was something more than just friends between us. She had a body of a goddess and a personality of that beyond. It was as if she only existed in a movie. Only I had the privilege to witness her true beauty of that in reality. I never took her granted for she taught me what true love was. She brought to life the four letter word that I thought would only be seen and not felt.

It was a breathtaking view, really. I climbed my way up a short mountain, but high enough for a stunning vantage point. At the top, large rocks serve as seats creating a cinema affect. At night, it serves as a perfect view of the strip. The lights gave it breath as it dances in the distance. To my surprise, she was there too. The first time in a great while. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. Her perfect silhouette brought to life with the compliment of the bright lights in the background. In that moment it was a battle for who would win over my attention. In the end, no matter what circumstance, she always did. The focal point of my happiness. I took a seat on a rather smooth rock. I wasn't sure if she wanted to talk so I walked quietly behind her. There is something that happens to you when you're sitting up on the mountain overlooking the whole city. It humbles you, putting you in perspective of the grander things. Thoughts trailed as my mind latched on, leaving a blank expression on my face. I quickly snapped back when I felt a hand on my shoulder. My head turned enough to see a familiar bracelet. Blue that faded into white. She always said it was our favorite colors joining as one. Oh how that was true. The thought of that bracelet made me smile, and by the time I recognized her face I let out a small laugh. She sat down and not before long, we got lost in each others thoughts. I don’t quite remember everything we talked about but words did not hold my attention. It was the passion she expressed in what she was talking about. The way her face lit up in excitement sent waves that echoed in my heart making it fragile. A fire in her eyes that magnified the beauty, burning my soul for love the longer I stared. Her laugh would play through my mind more times than my favorite song. I was home again and I never wanted to leave this time.

Hours felt like seconds, and after some time we decided to take a walk. We ended at a park not too far from the mountain. A beautiful park that does the community justice. A large field of smooth cut grass with a small man made pond in the middle. A path circles around the grass field and a tree line serves as a perimeter of the whole park. We found our way to the bench we would always sit at. Time had wrapped us in its presence and the both of us hadn't noticed how late it has become. Tiredness quickly crept up on her pulling her eyelids down. She placed used the bench as a bed and placed her head on my lap. I gently put my hand over her heart and her hand met mine. She gave a light squeeze. It was her way of telling me she loves me even when she's tired and on the verge up slipping away into the dream state. One of our many inside meanings. I never got tired of that. A half smile surfaced as she used every ounce of energy she had left of that day. It takes adorable to another level. She tried to put words to her thoughts but made half sentences that had no meaning. I gave a half chuckle and told her to just close her eyes. She always refused but each sentence made her fall asleep more and more.

She loved the sound of my voice so I told her a story while she dozed off. Every night I spent with her I would tell her a story for her to fall asleep to. On unfortunate nights that did not allow me to to be with her, I would call her and tell her a story by phone. Five minutes I was interrupted by another faint squeeze. Shortly after that a state in which dreams flourished had the privilege to claim the most beautiful soul for the rest of the night. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She was safe in my arms and nothing could hurt her. Not now. Not in this moment. Everything about, her from the mist of day to the calmness of the night, shouted “home”. A certain feeling of comfort was only achieved when she was in my arms. The sound of her breathing and the warmth of her hand meant everything to me. Time was still even if it were for a few moments. It was the first time in a long time that I was at peace.

In the distance sirens were growing increasingly loud. A perfect moment ruined by the cries of a piercing noise. I sat on the bench holding her while listening to the sirens becoming clearer and clearer. By my surprise, I looked down and noticed she was not responding to the noise and was sound asleep as usual. Everything happened so fast. The ground started to shake and split apart in front of my very eyes. The pond that was still as ever seconds ago was projected in the air in every which direction. Trees violently crashed to the ground as the leaves were swirling in the air. The sirens were all I could hear and focus on. The sky came crashing down and the walls began folding in. Darkness over came in a matter of seconds and then my eyes opened.

I couldn't believe it at first. A glimpse of the past collided with the present. My mind was racing and memories came flooding in. I was barely conscious yet her face seemed clearer than ever. I sat up on the edge of my bed and sent her a little prayer for wherever she may be then slowly rubbed my eyes. It’s been 9 months but I have a feeling that I’ll see her in nights yet to come. I’ll always love her.. in one reality and another.