I Scream, I Love, I Write.

My tongue dances behind my lips

To taste your candy coated kiss

sugar drops of heaven 

as my eyes sin with every glimpse

Sweet the sound of your playful laugh

the cheer that consumes my heart

Steering wheel to my soul

Your texture makes my mind lose control 

Cover my heart with melted chocolate 

Taste the caramel peel it's coated with

Red cherries waiting to be picked

Sitting on your chest that's aching to be licked

Gobble you up for premier satisfaction

You and I share a fatal attraction

So fill me up with your kindness

Show me what the good life is

Treat me 

Like

I would 

Treat you

My delicious love

Reviews

[ElizabethAnne]

I love your writing. This one is very good.
It's people like you that make me enjoy writing!!
Keep doing what you're doing.

[MoriartyMesa]

the hidden submission in this is interesting and I wonder how many others may have picked up on it. Nice job दोस्त

[Carly]

This is definitely different from your usual stuff, but WOW. It was delicious. It's subtlety erotic and sensual without being obscene.

The only line that I felt was a little awkward was

Red cherries waiting to be picked
Sitting on your chest that's aching to be licked

I think there might be a better way to go about that, or a better rhyme, maybe? I'm not a great poet, so I really don't know.

Either way, I thought it was beautifully done.

[KeeD]

Thanks for the wonderful reviews Carly, I agree with you even when writing this I found that line a little out of place. I'll try working on it, this isn't a poem i'm proud off though haha just a casual treat I wrote for myself.

[Carly]

No, be proud! It really is great :)

[Maria Linden]

Your use of rhetoric here is fantastic. This is an erotic poem, but you make it almost comical with your use of dessert (this is probably the weirdest sentence I'll ever write) and it turns into this alluring mix of innocence and sexuality. Well done:)

[BL]

Double meanings rule here and you have used them so very well, I like the shape of the text, like an ice cream glass.

[KeeD]

only you noticed it :D very cool:P

[BL]

:-)

[beyondpen]

haha.. Best of all i lovvvve the Double Entendre! Icecream? really!!!
what a wonderful write either ways... u r a rockstar!

[MandaBear]

Thank you for sharing excellent poetry. So sweet!!

[Saichiro Wolftotem]

Interesting meter. I particularly like the last bit and usage of the word 'treat'. A pleasure to read as always.

[Jeremy V Chiew]

Well written. The playfulness in choice of words is somewhat captivating. Thanks for sharing.

[Rob Santana]

Damn Kee I just seen a bunch of panties flying up in the air!!!! You go player!!!