300 Seconds

Your first time.

 

Just Five minutes.

Five minutes of pleasure,

Five minutes of adrenaline,

Five minutes of lust,

And five minutes of disregard.

 

All it took,

Were those five minutes,

Not only to question,

Or tear apart,

But also to unite,

And to blend.

 

Only five simple minutes,

Where I lost trust in me,

But gained a little more in us.

 

Nothing less than 300 seconds,

Did it take for me to realize,

Maybe I trust myself,

a little too much.

Author's Note

Written on June 17, 2007; last edited on May 4, 2008.

Reviews

[M@]

I've seen poems like this before, love poems trapped around the idea of lust. At least that what I thought before the emphasis on 300 seconds. A great way to not only make a reader do a double take, but to also give a tried and true topic a new glance: here, meaning that it only takes a few moments to lose yourself in said moment. Of course, that's just my interpretation of it, and I may be wrong.

I like the last two stanzas especially, as it seems to drive home the meat and potatoes of the poem, in a manner of speaking. The issue of trust becomes a major subconscious concern in any moment, let alone a moment like that. It's there that the poem really hits me hard, and I liked the way you tied that towards the end.

While others may say that they may like the entirety of the poem to drive home the point, it's not necessarily true, especially here. The first two stanzas are charming and quick with words and off/slant rhymes, which gives a speedy, witty tone to the first half of the poem, and the topic matter of the poem fits it. You don't overkill that either, as you bring it back to seriousness and drive the point home for the reader in the last half.

Very well done. Like I said, a great double take on an idea that sounded boring before I read this piece. Good on ya'.

[Legion]

Lovely (or not) how a second or more can change so much. Well written.

[Arthur Henn]

Very well done and said. A message within the poem.

Art

[Erotic Goddess]

Nothing less than 300 seconds,
Did it take for me to realize,
Maybe I trust myself,
a little too much.

Doesn't take a lot of time to figure those things out does it? This was great, I love the tone and the rhythm you use in this piece.

~Stephanie

[youngwriter222]

ohhh lala. What a romantic poem. It is very good.
300 seconds/5 minutes.