Train

at night

A carriage full of dried moths, faces sour with

old leather, a midnight softness,perhaps

a glass in water, slowly,

and you speak of love in the conjunctive, of course

you would have liked to have known more about me,

but your heart is walled up and full of soot as

roads and fires fly past the windows, they illuminate

half of your face, as you speak with care,

bloodless and monotone.

You are very reasonable,so sincere, your calm voice

regular as the ticking of wheels on rails, your eyes are railway bells.

But you have a brick in your chest, love`s asthma.

Reviews

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

Amazing how you convey the messages in this poem, so eloquent,
with hard hitting tone, great work :)

[Hidden Happiness]

kinda makes me wanna read it again and again..really good and picturesque..:-).

[G!o]

This is great art put to paper. I don't sincerely know what to write here but i'm amazed. This is a great piece.

[emmajoy]

Brilliant! I'm not sure how to review this. You'v created a scene, found the performers, and bound every word with real and raw emotions. That first stanza is as fine as fine can be. The use of railway terms is more than clever.. 'your eyes are railway bells'.

[Dr. Wood ?]

A fine piece of writing my friend, such undeniable talent. I too love the final stanza

[icaros13]

Excellent writing here. I have been on both sides of this track... Neither is very pleasant. Love your second and fourth stanzas. I am always having to remind myself, love is not reasonable or logical...

[Emily B]

your truth is hard and fast as a bullet