If I Died Tonight

A poem....

 

 

 

If I  went home,
And went through my drawer,
Took out a needle,
And threaded my heart

If I got home,
And went into the kitchen,
Snuck a bottle of pills,
And took them all

If I go home,
And I went to the bathroom,
And locked the door,
Took out a blade,
And bled some more

If I give up,
If I say I can’t handle it
Anymore
If I end my life,
And don’t even say
Goodbye

If I die tonight…
If I died…

Would you cry?
Would you know why?
Would you even care?
If I wasn’t even there?

If I die tonight,
I want you to know,
I love you more than air,
I just didn’t have enough flare

If I die tonight,
I want you to know,
You were my best friend,
The greatest person anyone
Could ever know

If I die tonight,
Will you all hate me?
Say I was selfish, stupid, and didn’t even care?

But guess what?
That’s how I feel when no one is
Even there

If I die tonight,
I want to say,
I couldn’t stay strong,
I was just all wrong

If I die tonight,
I want you to know,
It was never your fault,
I just couldn’t have a
Thought

If I die tonight,
I’m sorry
For my disappointments

I promised I would stay strong,
If you were there with me,
But between heroin and suicide,
The stakes were just too high

I can’t handle the drugs,
The cutting,
The drinking anymore

I can handle the hurting,
The worrying,
The loss of so many words

I needed you to stay strong,
And be there forever,
But instead you turned to drugs

I did the same,
So I have nothing to hide,
But you were different

You were always so strong

I don’t know if you will
Get help,
I don’t know if you will
Survive

I hope you’ll be okay,
I hope you’ll stay strong,
I hope you’ll figure everything out,
So your life won’t be such wrong

But…

If I die tonight,
Just know that I tried…

Reviews

[Ali]

I can relate to this is more ways than others. I don't know if you were trying to rhyme on purpose or not but I love it (:

[LostandAlone]

Thanks for the review

[chandlerl]

so many unanswered questions....but a lovely write....

[LostandAlone]

Yeah.. Thank you...