Playing In The Sand

When I was little I remember my sister and I went to the beach and we were just learning what sand was. How fascinating it was. So many things that laid beyond the sand.

We played together in the sand

Throwing it all around

We covered our bodies

And built sand castles

Every time we picked up the sand

It would fall through the cracks of our hands

When we would come out of the water

The sand would stick to our feet

We tried to wash it away

But it wouldnt go away

In the sand laid tiny objects

Mommy told us they were called sea shells

They were so pretty

And how beautifully they shined as the sun hit them

What looked like green spinach laid on top of the sand

It was so slimy and gross...

We loved playing in the sand

And when mommy told us it was time to go

We were sad to let go of the sand

Mommy said we could come back

.....

She kept her promise

And we were once again

With the sand

Reviews

[Star Shyne]

That was really cute! Awesome writing here... I can picture it in my mind =)

[PaperHearts]

I really liked this! I've grown up living beside the beach, so a lot of my childhood memories are about the beach, and reading this made me remember all the small moments that we so often forget. I liked the simplicity of this, and the way in which you described the innocence and somewhat blissful naivety of these two children. A lovely write!
~PaperHearts

[*molly]

it was like a movie in mah brain, its so cute ♥

[.nicole.]

I loved the way i could imagine everything, two young children playing in the sand during a day at the beach. the magic of it all.

I love the description of the seaweed, "looked like green spinach" because that's exactly what I always thought it looked like too.

this poem captured the innocence of childhood, the good times. makes me sad because I remember when my sister and I used to play together all the time. but I guess we just grew up. and we don't do that anymore.

[deeps]

You can feel the emotion within this write, very well expresed and very well written.

[Jess.]

I like it, it's a nice piece, but kinda seems like you wrote down the basic meaning of the poem, without filling in the cracks, it seems like it's missing a few small, key parts to it....but it's still good.

[Wolfe Greytome]

Seems like you were searching for something with this piece. But overall, still a good piece.