Final Breath

I have half a second left to live. A bullet gets closer and closer. I can't dodge, and I can't run away. This is my last second on earth. I am about to die.

Time seems to slow as the bullet traces the line that will end at my head. And end my existence.

Dawson’s eyes are cold and hard, the eyes of a killer whose heart was frozen solid. He double-crossed me, told me he loved me only to break my heart…and now end my life.

It’s strange; I’m not angry with him…what’s the point? I don’t even have a half-second left to live.

James Dawson had seemed like a nice man when we met at the small coffee shop where I work behind the counter. He ordered a regular coffee, a dash of cream, and a dinner date…to go.

My friend Courtney told me she didn’t like him, he was hiding something"something dark.

I laughed her off then, and now regretted it.

Oh Courtney, I wished I could have been a better friend to her. Her dad died six months ago, she was still hurting from that, and only too often I would find her crying in the store room. I’d leave her alone in her grief, telling myself she would want to be alone. When I knew all along that what she needed most was someone to be there for her.

I can only think back to all the friends I’d had, lots of people I was friends with, but only about half a dozen that had ever gotten close to me.

There was Emily, who was my elementary school best friend who had moved out of state in sixth grade, I really should have kept in touch with her.

Kara, the girl who I befriended after Emily left, but we got in a fight over Avery Hedrick, I lost out to her and she didn’t speak to me again, even after they broke up six months later. Stupid Junior High crushes; I should have fixed our relationship years ago…too late now.

 Rachel and Amy, were the two girls who had felt sorry for me and had helped me through high school and we had parted ways after graduation.

Cody, my first boyfriend, was the one who dated me for five years. We were the couple everyone expected to get married, but we went to different colleges and the strain of a long-distance relationship was too much for us and we both decided to end it before it got too painful. Despite the break-up and the fact that he’s dating another girl now, we are still good friends. Maybe I should have tried to make it work, he was the man of my dreams, and still is. Dawson was my lame attempt to fill the void left by Cody.

And then there was Courtney, my roommate in college, and the one girl I told all of my problems to and know she would listen, I wish I could have done the same for her.

But now what can I do? Six people I never let know how much they meant to me. Never will either.

Emily will find out I’m dead, sooner or later. Kara will be left with the regrets of never making up, just like me. Rachel and Amy will wish that we had more time together. Cody would miss me, and he’d probably hate himself forever for breaking up with me, if only I could go back and tell him that it wasn’t his fault, that I shouldn’t have let him go. Courtney…oh wow, she’s going to be devastated; first her dad and now me?

There are so many things I should have said and done. I should have gone to church more. I always knew there was a God. I got saved in Sunday school as a kid; I just never took religion seriously.

When I got to be a teenager, the passion just died. I stopped going to church regularly, I didn’t do drugs or anything, I just didn’t let being a Christian consume my identity. I mean, I’m a good person, not perfect I’ll admit.

That’s when the panic set in, What if I don’t go to heaven? Help me Jesus

What did I even do with my life? I broke so many hearts and I healed so few. What was even the point of my life? Helping myself? What a life.

So many regrets and so few thing I’ve done right. What was even the point of my existence?

No time to figure that one out. The bullet makes contact.

My forehead explodes in pain and my head snaps backwards before a white flash envelopes my vision and a piercing shriek overcomes my ears.

Why?

Reviews

[Marie]

Good. Short. Simple. No real plot, but a lot of content.

[Mike Wolfe]

That was my intention with this one, to get as much impact as I could with as little space and as little plot as I could.