Locked My Heart Away

Locked My Heart Away

A Poem by Nix is typing...
"

A poem by Nix and Nomo

"
Times are hard
Feelings get torn apart,
I want to handle things with my brain
And stop handling them with my heart
It's getting boring, 
It's getting tiring,
My brain just quit
My heart is hiring!
My heart worn atop my sleeve
My brain on leave, 
for which I grieve
My heart keeps taking over
Getting too powerful for me
I want to put it in a box
Lock it up tight
Make sure the lock is on just right
While my brain starts to board its flight
I take to myself
I give something I didn’t have before
Something I was missing
Courage, deep raw courage
Even when I was being discouraged
I don’t know how to control
The screams coming from my soul
My heart’s gone astray
Might keep it locked up for a day
I wanna leave
But I have to stay…
Maybe I can let my heart out one day
But it’s gotten too powerful
But at the same time
Too weak
It’s gotten to the point
Where I can barely speak
Boyfriend put his hands on me
He grabbed me by the butt
I turned around and slapped him
Then I kneed him in the nuts
I’m tired of his game
My anger started to inflame
I hate what he did
Even after I said
“No”
He said he loves me
I say, “Don’t tell, 
Show”
I take to myself
I give something I didn’t have before
Something I was missing
Courage, deep raw courage

© 2021 Nix is typing...


Author's Note

Nix is typing...
This is a collab Nomo and I did together, we were talking about her boyfriend troubles and she said, "I wish I could lock my heart in a box"
AND A POEM WAS BORN!!
I immediately started to sketch out a poem out of just those few words, and then I asked her if she wanted to do a collab and she was like YASSSSSS!!
I loved working on this poem with you, Nomo!!
I must have loved you so much in our past lives that I had to come back and find you again in this next one (Only you will understand this, Nomo, lol)
I'm so glad to call you my friend.

Tell me what y'all think of our poem!!!

My Review

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Reviews

I like it a lot. I have the same troubles. My brain makes so much sense and it so right!! But my heart says f**k that! I wanna have fun!!!!

Well written.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nix is typing...

1 Month Ago

Lol! I'm glad you could relate, Thanks for the read and review 🙂
What I can see from this post it is very good and emotional.

Posted 3 Months Ago


I've sometimes wished for a switch, but only when I have some sort of task that needs to be accomplished. Otherwise, I've taken a strange sort of pleasure in the pain. I've cried myself into an orgasm twice.

On rare occasions, I've taken Ibuprofen to deal with emotional pain:
https://news.utexas.edu/2014/07/31/ibuprofen-relieves-womens-hurt-feelings-not-mens/#:~:text=For%20years%2C%20researchers%20have%20known,and%20women%20report%20feeling%20better.

I've only done it when I had work I needed to get done, but it helped.

Posted 3 Months Ago


Nix is typing...

3 Months Ago

I've never heard of crying one's self into orgasm before, lmao. I love that 🤭
Thanks for .. read more
I'm sure a lot of people wish they could be more analytical and less emotional. I'm sure there'd be a lot fewer people who get hurt. Unfortunately, some people aren't like that. People have feelings. People feel love. People feel other emotions and if they get too deeply involved with other people, then it's not so easy to walk away. He loves me. I love him. How many people out there have said that or heard someone say that to them when people are discussing their relationships and the problems they entail?

The brain quits. The brain checks out. People are tired sometimes of having to think things over. Where they are; How they got there. What they can do about it. Sometimes it's easier to turn to drugs or something else to numb the pain and help them get through the day or night. Sometimes it's just easier than having to face reality and the fears and worries that are housed there. It's the same thing. Different day but the same problems, the same issues. The same doubts and fears that plague the waking mind. Again, masking the pain and guilt with a chemical solution to a problem is the fastest and easiest way. You'll pay for it in the long run but right now it's the option that feels best.

If only there was a way. If only there was a way to turn off the heart and the emotions and have the brain step in and make the decisions that need to be made. Seems easy enough. Right? After all, it is the brain that controls the heart's functioning. Why couldn't your brain direct the heart? Because that's not how it works. The heart wants what the heart wants. You wear your heart on your sleeve. It's hard to hide your feelings and yearnings. It's hard to hide the hurt you feel. Again, emotions.

You are at your breaking point. You don't know what else to do. What can you do? You don't seem to know. Sometimes, it's when people reach their breaking point. They don't know what else to do. It's just a reaction. It's just something that happens without thinking. A raw, emotional response to a situation or the environment they are in. What if you could lock your heart away and leave the brain to do the heavy work; to make the hard decisions? The heart is gone. The brain can't hide. It has to step up and do something. Make the decisions. Do what's best. The brain knows. The brain can act. One decision, just one decision and your life can improve and you can move on. Live a better life. The heart won't let you do that, though and the heart is too powerful for you to ignore and too weak to do what is truly right.

There he is. What is it that drew you to him. What is it that made you say "Yes" to him in the first place. Now he is coming to you. You don't want to and you tell him but he's not listening. He's not listening to your voice but maybe he'll listen to your knee. Ouch. I'm sorry, Baby. I didn't mean it. I really love you. Come here. I won't do it again. You know I didn't mean it.

You gave courage. It had been missing until now. What courage? The courage to stand up to him and finally say no or the courage to do what was best for you and walk away?

Posted 3 Months Ago


This is sad but the past hurts and now it’s so good to express yourself with writing.

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nix is typing...

3 Months Ago

Thanks for the review, Jamarr. :)
I love it, also THE PAST LIVES NEVER LIE. I love working with you it's really fun and I love how we can joke about my relationship and everything else! SORRY FOR FALLING ASLEEP ON YOU!!!

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on January 24, 2021
Last Updated on March 15, 2021

Author

Nix is typing...
Nix is typing...

Athens, GA



About
Uh, what can I say? Hi! I'm Phoenix (Nix) 🔥 Most of my poems are in my books :) except for Phoenix Parker, that's a book I wrote last year. Most of my writing is poetry, I'm always o.. more..

Writing