Mommy Dearest

You have been gone 30 plus years.
But I can run my fingers over the ridges
of memory
and you are still a palpable contradiction.
My mind holds unto you like a hand
fingers laced and clinging with a daughters
need and desperation.

Frail, stick thin old woman draped in blood
and a flimsy gossamer gown that robbed
you of the last vestiges of dignity
at your end...
An esophageal eruption spewing you into eternity.

Warm spring night cloaked in terror...
And I let him whisper our apologies to you
and rock you with the arms of my youthful regret
while I stood in front of a mirror applying make up
I never found necessary under ordinary circumstances

But escaped into in that extraordinary moment
when your life was hemorrhaging from
the corner of your mouth.
It was his fingers that removed the liver sized clot
that had absorbed your efforts to breathe
and mine that painted my lips a matching red
an odd normalcy to cover my dread,
for the doctor who would pronounce you dead.
   
 

Reviews

[Jessica{is inspired by ..]

Wow! that is truely one of the most powerful poems I have ever read! You bring the reader into the story and make it like we were there watching everything and feeling what you were feeling.

"My mind holds unto you like a hand
fingers laced and clinging with a daughters
need and desperation."

Your words are vivid with imagery and feelings that everyone can understand even in it's complexity.

Wonderful write!

Jess

[KAREN BROWN]

wow As you know I do understand because of my mom and dads passing. You had such heartache and pain I can accually feel it again. I'm sorry for your loss I know we will never forget the ones we love ever.My dad passed in 2002 and that was hard to because i felt so alone especially around holidays and there birthdays it tares me apart. thank you so very much for sharing this with me really.

[Pointblank]

The imagery here is amazing. I'm sure you don't need me to tell you. One can stand there with you in your experience.

[Toni Prehoda Kahler]

How could you ever let go? You write powerfully this intense drama of your mother dying. So much leaps out at me because you let me see through your own eyes. "Warm spring night cloaked in terror" this line opens up the cavern for me, first introduction to the "extraordinary" shoved right up against the "ordinary". I am pulled in to the theme of red, her blood first, and then the matching red of your lips. That you apply it to cover your dread is an incredible metaphor to me, shocking in its parallels and its deep sadness. That image shocks me into re-reading, I find myself following you in deeper.... toward the desperate daughter clinging...

This is deeply moving---you are brave to write like this. I am drawn to your intensity.

[Justin Tobey]

The strength of your words here is astounding! I'm amazed by the power you've infused in your writing! Well done!!! :D

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THIS IS AMAZING!

[Wildfleour]

Absolutely staggering in its power. Bravo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are one of the best, my friend.