Guilt in Tears

Guilt in Tears

A Poem by Priyanshi

GUILT IN TEARS


Sobbing and weeping make no sense, I know, dear.
Only the rivers of guilt flow down in form of tears.
Recalling the gone time is like stabbing yourself.
Cursed I speak,"why to love the one who can't be for my self".
Burning the tainting good photographs of a heart is better
than feeling the nightmares, realising me my great failures.
Moving to good roads is far-sighted among brave steps
than yelling to walk on bad roads which sting like sea crabs.
Deep down in nights, I listen to my own cries, oh dear.
In remorse, regretting, and find guilt in my tears.
for why I met and hugged you like u were my teddy bear.

© 2018 Priyanshi


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Featured Review

Overall your expressions are unique & unexpected, many creative ways to say what you're saying. I did not read this as a regular-rhyming poem, so I disagree with one of your reviewers (comment about last line) -- I like the teddy bear imagery, it sounds cuddly. In a few places, grammar construction sounds a little awkward . . . (line 3) "gone time" not clear what this means . . . "tainting good photographs" unusual combination of adverb/adjective . . . "realizing me my great failures" - wondering about "me my" repetition? But other than these little spots, overall your descriptions are original & vivid ("which sting like crabs" -- excellent). Fondly, Margie

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much ma'am...i respect your review:))



Reviews

Wow! From the starting to the end, I have enjoyed this.... creation..
Amazing..
Keep writing Priya..

Posted 6 Years Ago


Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much AA ... for the lovely review:))
I can find no words... beautiful

Posted 6 Years Ago


Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

It means a lot Sir.....thank u so much:))
That's sweet yet refreshing dear :)
Dear Sister, Keep writing!

Posted 6 Years Ago


Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

THnk u so much my sweet sister.....after a long time,....how r u doing?
Pragati Chaudhary

6 Years Ago

Ohhhh! That's so lovely to hear from you after a long period of time.....I am good. how are you ? DM.. read more
Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

:)) am also good
:))
Overall your expressions are unique & unexpected, many creative ways to say what you're saying. I did not read this as a regular-rhyming poem, so I disagree with one of your reviewers (comment about last line) -- I like the teddy bear imagery, it sounds cuddly. In a few places, grammar construction sounds a little awkward . . . (line 3) "gone time" not clear what this means . . . "tainting good photographs" unusual combination of adverb/adjective . . . "realizing me my great failures" - wondering about "me my" repetition? But other than these little spots, overall your descriptions are original & vivid ("which sting like crabs" -- excellent). Fondly, Margie

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much ma'am...i respect your review:))
I liked the entire poem except the last line in which you forced the rhyme by writing teddy bear.


Posted 6 Years Ago


Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

Thank you Najam so much for the kind words.....may be my line is not good.
:))
Najam Us Saher

6 Years Ago

I don't say that it is not good, It looks a bit childish. Don't let my words discourage you.
.. read more
Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

Oh.....No problem
:))
sometimes those memories just linger to long,great write

Posted 6 Years Ago


Priyanshi

6 Years Ago

Correct sir....Thnk u so much for kind review:))
 wordman

6 Years Ago

you`re welcome

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Added on March 29, 2018
Last Updated on March 29, 2018

Author

Priyanshi
Priyanshi

India



About
Am a girl who desires to travel a journey from the dream world to the real world, Livin' the beautiful dreams on the land of reality. MY LINES----- "Never did sacrifice a jewel of min.. more..

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