Chapter 3: Diversion

Amber

“Hello?”

“Oh, hi!” Amber said, trying not to sound awkward. It was Saturday morning. She had done her homework last night. Normally she would just stay in and read a book or something, but something about this place made her want to change. That’s why she called Kim.

“Hey, Amber!” Kim said, sounding fresh and enthusiastic as always. There was something about that girl that somehow always spread good vibes, to Amber at least. And it was nice to finally have a real friend. Weird, but nice. Throughout her life she had always been so focused on school that she didn’t have time for friends. As her dad put it: “why have a great life now when you can have an even better one when you’ve got an education?” but things were changing. Somehow, Kim was turning Amber into more than just Amber. Somehow, she was turning into more than just “the smart girl with the glasses”. Now she was Amber, without the glasses. But she could still be smart. She hadn’t worn the glasses since Monday when Kim removed them before the performance. Speaking about the performance, she hadn’t told her dad about that yet, or talked about the musical or Kim at all. To him, Amber was still just his smart little daughter with good grades. And it had to stay that way. Or, at least, for a little bit longer. She couldn’t imagine his face if she told him that she was interested in anything else but school. But now, today, she was going to break the rules (without him knowing, though) - she was going to spend time with Kim outside of school, as friends. Or, at least that’s what she was planning to do. If Kim wanted to. She sighed once and put on her usual smile, though Kim couldn’t even see her.

“So, uhm… how are you?” she asked. Dumb. She must’ve sounded so stupid. She really couldn’t find anything better to say? Why didn’t she just go straight to the case and ask if she was doing anything today? Pressing her face into the pillow, she almost hung up out of pure embarrassment. She was just so damn horrible with people (she hadn’t sworn much before, but throughout the week Kim’s language had started to influence hers, even in her thoughts she swore!)?

“Just as good as when we talked last night!” Kim said and laughed. Relieved, Amber laughed too.

“So, wanna hang out, or…?” Kim suddenly asked. She had taken the words right out of Amber’s mouth.

“Uhm, yeah, sure” Amber just said, holding her excitement back.

“But we can’t really be at my place” she sighed and thought of her dad.

“We… can’t be at my place either” Kim mumbled after a few moments of silence. “My aunt’s home” she continued. Amber noticed she sounded a bit sad, but she didn’t comment on it. If Kim wanted to talk about whatever it was, she would probably ask her herself. She definitely didn’t wanna pressure in any way.

“How about the park? Do you know where the park is?” Kim suddenly asked. Amber had been at the park a few times before to listen to music and be alone from her dad, who she told she went there to “study”.

“Yeah, I know where the park is” she said and smiled. “Meet you there in half an hour?”

“Okay!” Kim said.

“Okay…” Amber said, swelling bit off.

“Okay” Kim said again. Amber didn’t want to hang up, there was something soothing about Kim’s voice that somehow calmed her. But she was going to see her in half an hour anyway.

“Okay.” Amber said. She didn’t even know what was going on about that, okay was just a word. But it wasn’t, it was something different. It was somehow what their friendship was based on. Okay.

“Okay.”

 

Kim

Kim ran as fast as she could. She was late. She had been working on the drawing of Amber and wanted to have it done before meeting her so that she could give it to her. Pathetic, but still. She wanted to give it to her and she was gonna. Her head was spinning as she turned the last corner before the park. God hope Amber didn’t wait long. What if she had already gone home again, thinking Kim let her down? What if -

As Kim looked inside the park, Amber was sitting on one of the swings. Relieved, she finally slowed down and quickly tucked the drawing into a pocket. Amber smiled widely as she saw her, and Kim sat down on the other swing before Amber could get up. This was a good place to talk.

“So, what’s up?” she asked, trying to sound casual.

“Not so much” Amber said. “How about you?”

“Same” Kim mumbled. Then they didn’t say anything. This was pretty much what Kim had been worried about, the awkward silence between new friends. She started moving her fingers around on the handle of the swing, thinking like a maniac to come up with something to say, but she couldn’t think of anything. Or, she did have plenty of stuff to say, but she couldn’t.

“So, about your aunt -“ Amber started, but couldn’t finish the sentence, probably afraid to cross lines that shouldn’t be crossed. Teresa wasn’t really the thing that Kim wanted to talk about, but maybe it could at least get a conversation going.

“What about her?” she asked, not meant as in being offended, more like to lead on the sentence, but Amber clearly took it the wrong way and got a kind of panicking look in her face. Kim quickly smiled at her to show she didn’t mean it that way. Amber sighed in relieve.

“Well, it’s just, you seemed kind of sad when we talked” Amber noticed, and her head lowered. “Is it something you want to talk about?” she asked and looked a little bit up again. At that exact moment, Kim decided. She didn’t know why, but she decided that she was going to be totally honest with Amber about Teresa, and… everything. She sighed once and looked up into the crown of one of the trees surrounding them.

“You know that feeling when you feel like you’re surrounded by trees that you can’t get by but you’re not strong enough to hold an axe yet?” she asked, her voice a bit groggy. Amber moved a little bit closer, as far as the swings would allow. She probably wouldn’t understand. Why was she even telling her this?

“Well, that’s how I feel about my aunt, Teresa” she continued and tilted her head a little. What a bunch of emotional crap she was loading out.

“Teresa is all the trees at once, caging me in all around. But it’s not just trees -  it’s drunk trees. Drunk trees, struggling to hold balance and in danger of landing on you and crushing you to pieces” she was getting the picture in her head and couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“You want to go back to your own forest where the trees wouldn’t supress you, but it burned down, so this is the only place to go, and even though the forest is dead drunk, it’s better than being vulnerable, out in the open, with no home at all.” She blinked once to keep a tear from coming, and realized that Amber’s hand was resting on hers. She took it.

“And all you want… is really just to light a fire, just to watch it burn. Even if you’re going to burn with it.” she couldn’t do more. Why was she even telling Amber, a girl she just met less than a week ago, this kind of stuff? Pathetic much. But she couldn’t help it. As she looked down and realized Amber was resting her head on her shoulder. Suddenly the tears flowed freely. She couldn’t help it anymore. She just couldn’t. But somehow, it didn’t feel weird around Amber, though. Amber had turned into a safe-place. There they just sat for several minutes, silence between them, but it was in a good way. It was a comfortable silence.

“I know” Amber suddenly said. Kim looked down at her, and, surprised, realized that she had tears in her eyes.

“My dad is my forest that I can’t break out of. My axe is my freedom. But I lost that long ago.” Amber mumbled. Kim didn’t know what to say.

“Amber -“

“He doesn’t know I’m here with you. He thinks I’m studying, because apparently that’s all what life is about. Get a good education now so you can get a good life later. The life now doesn’t matter, but the future counts. The future counts everything. But what if I don’t want the future…” a tear landed on Kim’s shoulder. Kim was just sitting, looking down at her. This wasn’t what she had been looking for. She wasn’t good at taking care of others. She wasn’t the right one to come to. But she couldn’t let go now, so instead she just squeezed Amber’s hand lightly and smiled at her, but Amber wasn’t even looking at her. She was somewhere far off. But maybe it was better there anyway.

“Then seize the now” she suddenly said. Amber looked a bit up.

“But how?” Amber almost whispered.

“You don’t get a manual for that. You just kind of do it” Kim said. She remembered her sister saying this to her once, before she moved out. Kim wasn’t sure why she had said it, she just remembered. It was like she knew Kim was going to come into a situation like this. Amber dried her eyes and tried to straighten up. Maybe Kim had actually hit something that helped her.

“Okay…” Amber whispered.

“Okay?” Kim smiled at her, and she smiled back.

“Okay.”

 

For the next few hours they just sat, talking about anything. That feeler had actually started a conversation between the two of them. Incredible. It was like some kind of barrier between them had been broken down. Kim liked to imagine that they broke it down together, like, teamwork and everything. And there weren’t even any pieces left they needed to climb over - they just went straight through. Kim couldn’t do anything but smile. Finally she felt like Amber was actually bonding with her too, so it wasn’t just Kim bonding with Amber. They were even starting to get intern jokes, and were laughing so hard they almost fell down from the swings, when -

“Now now, look who we have here, holding hands and everything!” Kim looked up. A few feet away from them, Damon was standing, wearing his usual, annoying smirk. Kim was just about to get up, but Amber held her back. She honestly didn’t wanna let go of her hand anyway.

“F**k off, you jerk” she hissed and turned away from him as well as she could. Annoyed like hell, she realized that he wasn’t going to go - actually, exactly the opposite. As Kim followed him with her eyes, he walked over beside us and sat down on the swing right beside Amber.

“What? This isn’t your park” he said, still smiling. God how she hated him. Noticing Amber’s uncomfortable look, she tried to pull her a bit closer.

“Oh, so you want her all to yourself, huh, Killer?” he said and laughed. Killer was what he usually called her when they were together, because she tempted to be violent. Kim could literally kill him with her eyes. Or, if only she could.

“Well, what if I want a little piece of Amber too?” he said, and before Kim could do anything, he swung an arm over, put it around Amber’s shoulders and pulled her closer. Furious, Kim stood up, but she still couldn’t let go of Amber’s hand. Not with the look she was having in her face. Not right now. She didn’t even know what she was going to do, so she just sat down again. Damon started laughing even louder.

“Dangerous, little Killer. You know, you’ve gotta watch out with this one, she’s not easy when she’s mad with you” he said and winked at Amber, who had started to struggle to get free, but his grip was too tight.

“You and I both know I’m never easy” Kim yelled, gripping Amber’s hand a little too tight. Damon backed a bit off, pretending to be scared, but then smirked again like the idiot he was. Tears started to appear in her eyes. He wasn’t going to give in just like that before he had had his “fun”.

“But don’t worry, Killier-kimmie, I’m going to take good care of her” he said and gripped her a little bit tighter. “Me and Amber here are going to be besties! Right?” he looked at Amber with a wide smile, but it faded into a smirk again when she didn’t send one back.

“Amber and me” Kim corrected through her gritted teeth. Damon smiled again and started laughing.

“Sarcastic are we, huh” he said and winked at her. Kim sent him the finger with her free hand, which just made him smile even more.

“Maybe later” he said and grinned. “Oh no, wait… aren’t you a lesbian? Wasn’t that the reason we broke up? Because, apparently, you couldn’t take the D?” he continued, frowning at the last sentence as if he was actually feeling bad for her. That was it. She couldn’t just sit here and let him think he was better than her - but most of all, she needed to get Amber away from him, somehow. Damon had noticed Amber’s reaction at the word “lesbian” and smiled way too satisfied.

“Oh, so you didn’t even tell her?” he said and tried to act offended on Amber’s behalf. “Well, I’ve got a responsibility then!” he yelled and stood up. “Fair lady, I shall protect you from this sickening human being! I don’t even wanna imagine what thoughts she must have had around you!” he continued and held Amber so tight Kim almost let go. She couldn’t go any closer; if she went closer, she would have to face him. But she couldn’t let go. Her hands were getting slippery. No. She couldn’t let go. No. Damon started walking, dragging the helpless Amber with him. No. She tried to stumble along with them, but her legs were numb. No. This wasn’t happening. No. The fingers let go one by one -

“AMBER -“

Everything after that happened fast. Somehow, Amber had been able to bend her neck so that she could bite Damon in the hand. She must have bitten hard, because Damon screamed like the little girl he was and finally let go. Quickly, Kim got up, kicked the confused Damon in the face, grabbed Amber’s again hand and ran off without looking back. She could hear Damon cry in pain though, and couldn’t help but laugh.

“That’s the second time you’re breaking my nose this week, Killer!” he yelled at them.

“Like I give a f**k!” Kim yelled back as they turned the corner away from the park.

 

Kim lead them the library and they found a couch in the back. Damon wouldn’t set a foot in here. By now, she realized just how frustrated she had been in those few moments her and Amber’s hands weren’t touching. Exhausted, she leaned all the way back in the couch, as did Amber.

“You alright there?” Amber asked between stuttered breaths. Kim looked at the blood on the tip of her boots and laughed. She had hit properly. She leaned back again and nodded at Amber.

“How about you? He was all over you” she asked and pulled a hand through her greasy hair. “Damn it, you were the one being harassed here!” she added and leaned her head against the wall.

“I-I’m fine” Amber stammered. She obviously wasn’t. Kim couldn’t believe that Damon would actually do this to her. To a person he didn’t even know. Damn it she hated him. She was forgetting why she was even together with him in the start - actually, she couldn’t even remember anymore.

“No you’re not” Kim half whispered and leaned in against Amber. Amber lay an arm around Kim, and they hugged tightly for the next few minutes.

“Damon is…” Amber mumbled into Kim’s shirt.

“A jerk.” Kim finished and smiled. Amber laughed a little. “No, that’s not even the word. I don’t even know what the name is for his kind!” Kim continued and laughed too.

“A fuckboy” Amber whispered, and Kim couldn’t help but laugh even more. She didn’t expect Amber to say something like that, and especially not in a library. Amber started laughing too, and they ended up laughing so hard the librarian had to tell them to turn it down, and even then, they still giggled a little. A fuckboy. Yeah, that was the only rightful definition of Damon. A f*****g fuckboy.

“But he were harassing you too, you know” Amber mumbled after a while. “Verbally” she looked up at Kim. Kim just shrugged and smiled.

“I’ve dealt with him before, I can deal with him again” she said. Amber tried to smile too, but suddenly jerked as Kim touched her shoulder.

“Does it hurt?” she asked and quickly got up to look at it.

“Only a little” Amber said and smiled.

“Are you sure?” Kim said, starting to get worried.

“Honestly, I’m alright, okay?” Amber said and straightened up.

“Okay” Kim said and leaned back into the couch again.

“Okay” Amber said as she closed her eyes.

Later that day, Kim walked Amber home, keeping her tight all the way. She never got to give her the drawing that day.

Author's Note

It's okay if you start hating Damon (I do too)

Reviews

[Jordyn Gray]

I'm glad I'm allowed to hate Damon, because URGH!
It's very good! I'm kinda surprised that Kim isn't' intimidated by Damon. Things like that tend to be absolutely /terrifying/. If she's actually fearless, that's great! If she isn't, maybe it sends her into a panic attack? (I'm just throwing out possibilities, because I can't imagine anyone not being scared by that situation)