Hannah

She's afraid of her own damn thoughts.

         afraid that if she stops she'll feel something

                                                       feel all that she's been fleeing from

No one ever told her that it was okay for her to feel that way.

So she'll run where ever she can get.

                     Drown those thoughts.

                           Sink them in the river of music

                                                 an ocean of distraction

                       Put a rock around their necks and watch gravity have its way long before they ever                                      have a chance to have their say

Has she ever known peace?

A non-destructive feel, unguarded by defensive words or pretending?

        She runs.

        She always runs.

    Her thoughts, they haunt her always.

         She fears and her penance is loss of authenticity with self.

She prays and makes the best happen for them.

"It makes me strong"

                                  she tells herself, holding herself up with one hand.

"I can do this"

                       repeats in her mind, although it's never worked

                                                     although it never can.

Care for others can never replace caring for self.

Other's lyrical feelings can never properly replace actual ones.

                       She fights for nothing, for she cannot win.