The end

The end

 

Bruised,

Bleeding,

Arms covered in her distress

 

Pain,

It hurts,

Her tears spill down on her tattered dress

 

This isn’t the life she wanted

Hell, she only wanted love

 

Not only that,

Love, affection, wealth, a sense of pride

All of the above.

 

Is this what you want?

She screams to the heavens

 

She sinks to the floor,

Her cries are for that of a

Fellow named Devon.

 

But what does he care if I’m hurting?

She continuously asks

 

Deeper and deeper into her

Depression she basks.

 

The dark room is cold

She should’ve listened to all the things she’s

Been told.

 

She’s worthless,

She’ll never amount to a thing.

 

She only wants to be loved,

Above everything.

 

But it seems she won’t even get that

Ha, no surprise.

 

All there’s left to do now,

Is wait and wait as she slowly dies.

 

Devon is left wondering what he did wrong

Unfortunately for him, he wasn’t smart

He didn’t open his eyes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

This is kind of a compilation of False Affection and Twisted Revenge. I tried to fit those two in here. Like a sequel of some sort or something. Hope you liked it. =]

Reviews

[Gianna Perry]

Another incredible piece you've produced. Sam is right, you have a way of conveying your (or perhaps someone else's?) emotions through poetry. There's a strong message that, again, I agree with Sam on. She's right when she says that there aren't too many people looking out for you out there, which is a terrible thing to think about. Once you find that one person who you know is always going to take care of you, it'll all be better. There's no use in killing yourself over someone who's not meant to be... I'm not disagreeing with the ideas portrayed here at all, just rambling on...

The rhyme scheme is fantastic (I'm running out of adjectives to describe this...) and a very good way to draw in the reader. It's a good hook. Overall, another amazing piece. *APPLAUSE!*

~Gianna (but still Shayna on the inside :)

[Sam Cambell]

Nice rhyme scheme and all, but what really shines through is the message. It's tough to realize that in this world, there is no one who's gonna take care of you and not many who will even give a s**t whether or not you keel over and die, much less about your feelings. But honestly, once you realize that and know that you're strong enough to make it on your own, no one can make you feel like that again, especially not a boy. I hope this isn't about you, but you described so well it SOUNDS like you've felt like this before. You always convey deep emotions in your work. Keep it up. :)

[Alex Thomas]

Very dark. And very deep. The rhyme scheme draws one in immediately. The message of the poem keeps you until the end, leaving a hollow gap as the last lines are read.

[M.A. Van Dyke]

The only thing that didn't flow smoothly or hit me instantly was the ending, but then again, I haven't read the two poems this one follows! Over all, very well written and I dig it! Have a great day! I just drank an energy drink! Lol, can you tell?!!!!!!!

[Cassiopia Summers]

This is one of my favorites that you've written. I love it.

[the-One-with-the-Darkne..]

Very good. Seems to fit what im going through. Very nice capture of emotions.. very good flow. Have u been stalking me?

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

powerful emotions~ this is the breaking when one does not know how to listen and the one who should speak has lost her soft voice amidst his crushing streams~

[Cynthia]

Powerful poem with strong emotion.
So sad, this poem is so sad.
Love it a lot!

[Jonathan De Elvira]

kinda sad and hurting at the same time. poor girl, he's such a prick..

[(JR) Joshua Hernandez]

wow, great poem, but sometimes wat we want and wat we need, are two diff things, soemone will cpme in your life and will love you, I know it, but great poem

[red_saphyre]

this poem holds very strong emotion. another wonderful great write.