SUNKEN SOUL

A sunken love remain unburied in the hope to live once again.

Everything has been lashed off,
for my dreams were set alone those shores,
that i used to cheer,
adore,
and speak those endless stories,
in dark beautiful nights...

Over the surface i'm empty,
like those sunken islands,
with beauties miles down,
lying in silence,
away from rays,
away from life...

Infinite cries went unheard,
and tears mixed with sea,
but i still cry,
cry for those pearls,
for those memories,
yet with me,
dead and dark...

I'm still unburied,
for i wish to breath,
to live a life with her,
to rebuilt all with love,
with passion,
but unfortunately,
its an illusion,
which feeds my soul,
which keep me unburied...

Those rains do give hope,
for the world do turn green,
and i do believe,
that she'll know me,
my pain someday,
or maybe not???

Author's Note

Critique reviews welcomed

Reviews

[Nautili]

My favorite imagery in this is of the sunken island, it reminded me of the lost city of Atlantis... I like the idea of all the beauty and vibrant life being hidden from the surface. All the beautiful fish and coral now living in its crevasses....like a soul that has endured pain and loss, and a certain terrible beauty grows in its place, a wisdom and a profound patience to replace all the sunlit days.

[Monica]

Infinite cries went unheard,
and tears mixed with sea,
but i still cry,
cry for those pearls,
for those memories,
yet with me,
dead and dark...

Beautiful and well written :)
I enjoyed reading your poem

[Sleeping Maiden]

Awww...so beautiful. Love really is the bliss a person can give the best joy in the world! but the pain from love can be agony.. and i felt it here in this piece. I enjoyed reading it. =) Lovely work!

[$êlvån]

@warren tanx 4 pointing out:)..couple of spelling mistakes happened in last few works:p..this one i checked multiple times but still i missed that..i guess i need to work more on that.thanx again:-)

[Warren L.G De Mills]

This is a good piece. "for my dreams were set alone (Is this supposed to be "along"?)those shores, " That kinda threw me off a bit in the first stanza but everything else was pretty solid. I enjoyed reading

[Pax]

my sadness goes to the sunken soul
beautiful

[Callie]

"Infinite cries went unheard, and tears mixed with sea, but i still cry," this part is probably my favorite. Good work, an amazing piece.

[Suditi]

The 2nd and 3rd stanza are killer.
Actually the entire poem is WOW.
Great work Selva. :)

[Diwakar - "The Warrior ..]

Super cool.................you can really put more emotion to it to make it majestic :-)

[Geraldine]

This is very well-written. ^^ I liked it.

[Pikachu]

this is really good. I love it!

"It's an illustion,
which feeds my soul,
which keep me unburied." Love it.