Thoughts Never Spoken

A life not worth fighting for, but a decision that could change everything.

The rocks crumbled and fell, unable to tell I ran to the edge

thinking and feeling... seeing and being, someone im not.
A thoughtless mind told to visit a world unkind, uninteresting, and so... unavoidable I stood, breathing everything in as much as I could. The sea, the cliff, the edge
and my next move.

I took a visit to a country I had not known, somewhere where my thoughts could be alone...

Discovering another part of myself, someone else.
A life became brighter, better.
 A life spoke volumes and pronouced every letter of my absence, to you.

Years past and without contact from my old life, I developed a relationship with the moment.

Although I have not yet told you where I am, the wind will hopefully whisp, dance and present my new character, my new passion
back to you.


For i am sorry, for my silence.
But love knows no frequency, so i will use my existence to speak in your unanswered dreams.
                     and i 'am' sorry... for my slience.

Author's Note

Your thoughts? I really dont know what to think of it.

Reviews

[SheActsLikeSummer]

This was really good. I thoroughly enjoyed it. But I thought in places, you were a bit to forward with what you were saying. It's all very well written, but some details could be taken out, like the 'four years'. You could say 'For years' instead, having the exact number somehow takes away from the emotion. Poetry isn't for facts, it's for meaning. Anyway, I really, really enjoyed it. Sorry if I was being a bit harsh :P

[Octob3r Star]

It reminded me of waiting. Very good writing. Many skills here.

[Lunny]

that was where I discovered another part of myself, someone else.
Years past and without contact from my old life, I developed a relationship with the moment.
those are the parts I don't like. it's more of a sentence than a poem. besides that, I like the poem :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the set-up of the poem. Allow each thought and action to have purpose.
"Years past and without contact from my old life, I developed a relationship with the moment. "
I like the many strong statements in the poem. Sometime silence is the only answer. Thank you for the excellent poem.
Coyote

[Liderien]

This piece was really good, the concept and the feeling. Editing isn eeded I feel to make it flow a little better. Poetry is so hard to accomplish on a first write. The trick is simplfying the sentences without losing the meaning. For example:
"thinking and feeling and seeing and being, someone im not."

thinking, feeling, seeing, being, someone I'm not.

I hope this helps. This is a very good write though

[Dean Kuch®]

I liked this. We as human beings often wonder about those we once cared about, where are they now? Do they ever think of me? And it is in those quiet, secretive places where we get away from everything and everyone to reflect, we feel thier presence there with us...and dream. Nice piece and good thoght provoking read...

[Pencrafter]

This poem presents many challenges. The small font, for me, makes it almost unreadable. The story seems to talk about a friend left behind, of a reaching out for another kind of experience, or something. You have stark images and emotional presence. Interesting.

[Chip]

Personally I think the structure could be improved - you should set a number of lines per stanza. Its makes it more neat and readable. You aren't breaking any poetry rules by not doing that, you can do it however you want, but I think it would look better with a set number of lines per stanza.

Although the poem itself is good. It does well in showing the pain you or whomever it is about experienced. This is the first work of yours I have seen, I will have a look at more.

[r. f. jordan]

this piece seems to step outside of the usual constructs, and speaks to the reader of the vastness within being. the joy of change. the twinges of regret, and the triumph within hope. this is excellent work, and i appreciate you sharing it with me on this site.