My Story

A journey, of someone who went the wrong way, who stumbled down the wrong path at an early age. Who kept walking deeper and deeper in to the asylum of their own mind until they forgot what goodness was. What it felt like to smile. Thoughts of suicide were always on their mind, and they tried so hard to end it but they couldn't so they cut instead, showing everyone their pain through the blood on their arms. Pushed and abused they wandered aimlessly searching for a friendly face in the ever receding crowd. But then one day there was no one.  There was no one at all. They hid in the corner and folded in on themselves as they slowly seized to exist. They fell into a deep sleep and weren't to be awoken. 

But then they opened their eyes. Something had changed, something big. There was white. And then there was color. Everything they'd never dreamed was there and it was real. The crowd had returned, and instead of hateful snarls, there was cheerful smiles, and leading the group was a girl, the most beautiful of it all. Then something clicked. This is how it's suppose to be. This is what life feels like and its wonderful. And then they felt love. For what seemed like the first time in their life. 

That one girl changed my life, she made me see all the goodness in the world and how kind a caring hand could be. And most important of all she taught me how to smile again. 

Reviews

[The Nude Writer]

Wow.. a very powerful story, and told in such a rapid way.. felt very out of control.
Thanks for being so true.

[Silas]

My apologies, I tend to skip to the next topic when I talk about my past. I'm not quite done though, so tell me if you like the rest when I get the chance to sit and write again :)

[Trigorin]

You have a good story here and there's a great deal of room to expand, but at present, I don't really feel this is suited for much of anything. There's not really any characterization or any real reason for the reader to care at all, and that's never a good thing. I'd consider either making this part of a larger piece or expanding on this a great deal more.

[Silas]

Its not really meant for anyone to care it was just a short piece for my poetry club at school, our subject was self...so I did my story... And the reason I didn't want to expand on it is because when I tell my story most people get board or look at me different. I just thought this kept it short and sweet. But thank you, I will work on expanding it. I appreciate the review.

[Silas]

Actually I've been thinking, I'm going to redo the whole thing. Thank you.