Free

Finally finished, I hope you enjoy the poem! Writing this was a blast, I'd do it again any day. Very enthralling, exhilarating experience.

Slaughter the martyr

Chained to the alter

Harvest the hallows

Born from tomorrow

Hearts that are shallow

Die through the hours

Baptised in battle

Hypocrisy is my belief

Grieving soul awakened

Shaped by a rapist

Escape the hatred

Feed the ill-fated

Awaited torture

My misfortune

Mindless mortal

Join the circle

Incorporeal hopeful

Open wounds ugly

spoonful’s of morsels hungry

Current killers love me

Reveal the thrillers suffering

Stronger than the shrill sound of nothing

Cries of the monster, calling

Forgotten, unresponsive

Comprehend the dishonest

Hatred harnessed

Carved in cadavers like vomit

Bonded into the bloodshed

Symbols on my memories

Committed to the matrons

Of this insanctuary

Insanity unsanitary vanity inside

With the blood of many kinds

With the poison the lead heavy

Severing the serving portions

Eating our own emotions

We remain hoping

Our eyes blind, but open

Pretend to see what lies tomorrow

Through this deeply seeded horror

Growing floral sorrow, anger breaking morals

I grin reliving the beginning of sinning

Giving in is for p***y’s, I’m winning until it’s over

With my arm held high above my head

Standing on a mountain of bodies

Rotting under the heat of dead flesh

Trying to reach the sun before I’m crushed

Breathing in my blood for everyone’s lust

Somebody who died years ago, a husk

And has no place to go, not but the rush of blood

Inside the heart of a hopeless monster

Who has nothing but body mind and soul

And a bucketful of hope

They can call me a joke

The moment I spoke

I spat out the taste of hell

I broke out of my shell

Spelling my story

Stringing my sentences into a song

Die smiling in the bile and

Grasp the sun’s light, still holding on

For everyone, until I’m shrivelled, shivering, done

Until the darkness consumes me

And the light out does me

Black blood dried in the summer heat

Cheat death, defeat your kill count

Amount to a final break down

Countdown, break out, give myself now

Until I’m buried in the ground

Bleeding into a new reality

And finally be free

 

Author's Note

I very seldom reply to reviews, but I promise I read EVERY single one. I look forward to my next review because it helps me learn. Even if it's just one word, I promise, I will be ecstatic to have the chance to hear what you have to say. Whenever you write something about my poems, or the themes of my poems, or criticize me it is not in vain. I will listen, learn and be thankful.

Reviews

[Ghost writer]

I feel like you were saying that you slowly became imprisoned by the beliefs of others, like they saw you as some kind of awe full monster for being yourself, so you eventually retreated inside yourself maybe in some ways becoming the monster the saw you as, but then eventually finding yourself again, giving up on trying to please people and just trying to please yourself, at least that's how I read it though some lines do confuse me, I'd love to spend more time picking it apart sometime.

[R.J Calzonetti (SinisterPotatoe)]

That's essentially what the poem is. I am not a monster. I want to be free from the opinions and stick to the facts. I want people to know me to understand me, rather than understand me because of what I look like, how I speak, what the world calls me, or others. To not just assume. I wish to be free from the propaganda of life. I have the right to be myself. to live a life like anyone else.

[Ghost writer]

I agree and completely get it, I feel the same way, the world seems to want to hide the best minds

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

The deeper he goes...nobody knows...until they turn off the light.

[Davidgeo]

It kinda seems like you're just rhyming. And you sacrifice any deeper meaning simply to "flow" and stick to your rhyme scheme.

Nothing about this read naturally. Nothing about this goes beyond the clichés of emo poetry.

Try harder next time.

[wordman]

damn jack you touched on it all,,impressive write

[.]

This was different than all other pieces, you have written! So congrats over this new piece. Short lines are easy to understand and kinda comfortable. I always like to check your latest poems and I always enjoy reading them...So a great thanks for sharing them.
Sorry for being so straight-forward with this review.
And Good Luck for your poems!

[LazerRays]

Aye! What a fantastic poem! I love the quote
"We remain hoping
Our eyes blind, but open"
I love this. Hope you add more soon, Jack :)
-Sarah (or saree)