Echoes of You

Echoes of You

A Poem by Relic

~Echoes of You~

Your ghost hides in corners of our wrinkled sheets
reaching out transparent hands to grasp at my foolishness.

I've never enjoyed swimming naked in guilt's sea - 
It leaves me dripping remorse.
It seems, death's formidable grip can trump a full hand 
of indifference every time.

The mundane, repetitious days of our existence
held me in perspective as one
too ambivalent to shake his disembodied shoulders. 

The scent of your demise to me seemed innocuous -
fleeting, and unable to bloom;

But, flowers - I've discovered - are fragile things 
that in a short period of time
will die from the slightest chill.

And I...unbelievably -
immersed in my neglectful, narrow corner -
unable to sympathize or relate to simple needs -
never noticed at all -
your petals -
falling one by one.

How often have men picked their flower in life only to ignore her later through the trials of marriage? Her tears like petals have fallen. Now, through her absence, he realizes too late, what he has done: Disregarded and Ignored his soul mate.

Your thoughts are always welcome.


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© 2021 Relic


Author's Note

 Relic
Note to self: Changed the picture and a couple of words.


A quick note:

~~This is by far my most popular poem. And yet, it didn't start that way. Many young people are offended by advice or suggestions from others. They feel insulted that someone would critique their writing.

As for me, I came here not just to share my writing but to learn as well. If it wasn't for suggestions from Rick Puetter and Girl Friday (see below) I don't think the poem would have been as good. The poet Richard also helped me fine tune the poem and it is now--after all these years--(in my mind) complete.

We can always learn from other people as long as we know they have more experience and know-how than us.~~

My Review

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Reviews

I dabble on a few other poetry sites and many of them have highlight features and on this poem I would just about be marking up every line I would leave a few spaces for contrast:/ I would have to say this is by far one of your most remarkable poems i have read to date I am stunned by the imagery and the silent lines in between the stanzas a fine poem from a keen mind... Mr. Relic add this one to your reliquary

Posted 3 Months Ago


 Relic

3 Months Ago

I appreciate your comment, Robert. Thank you and have a merry X-mas and happy new year.
Richard has a keen eye for polishing up a diamond, this poem is ad lovely as ever. Beautiful work my friend.

Posted 3 Months Ago


 Relic

3 Months Ago

Thank you for reading, Cherrie. Merry X-mas.
As you said "my most popular poem" and for a myriad of good reasons. Another could write this same poem, the same topic, and the result is something befitting a Hallmark Card. If your poem was sold on greeting cards none of us would be able to afford one. Thank you for sharing.

Posted 5 Months Ago


 Relic

5 Months Ago

That's kind of you to say. Thank you, Delmar.
What I saw when I read the first line was not sheets on a bed.
It was sheets of paper instead.

"Don't trade what you have for something better."




Posted 7 Months Ago


Laconic Meraki

7 Months Ago

I meant painting such beautiful pictures with your words. 🙄🤷❤
 Relic

7 Months Ago

haha, well I thank you again. :-)))
Laconic Meraki

7 Months Ago

Ditto.
Keep calm and write on 💜
I always come back to read this poem, I am surprised I have never left a review. This poem speaks volumes

Posted 9 Months Ago


There is not much to be said for this Relic ... except bravo ... you have produced a near perfect piece about the loss of love and regret at the loss and the role the protagonist has played in it and come to realize the mistake that was made.
Well done ... a good write

Take care be safe

Posted 10 Months Ago


 Relic

10 Months Ago

Thanks so much, Ted. :)

I am almost lost for words... such a beautiful, insightful and understanding bit o poetry .. thoroughly enjoyed and so deserving of each of those 318 … yes three hundred & eighteen previous reviews.. and I'm sure there shall be many more.. All Good Things,

Neville

Posted 10 Months Ago


 Relic

10 Months Ago

Thanks very much, Nev. :)
Neville

10 Months Ago

You are most welcome...
But, flowers - I've discovered - are fragile things
that in a short period of time
will die from the slightest chill.

This is so true, i love these lines so much. I can feel the emotions in this write. Very well written

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

 Relic

11 Months Ago

Thanks for taking the time to read and review.
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T
Oh this one hit home too much, which is exactly what makes it great. If only we could make someone see the gift that is before them and help them understand the need to cherish it while it is theirs. Regrets come after the loss, when we lift up our heads from our own selfish place and then see what was always before us. T

Posted 1 Year Ago


You brilliantly express many aspects of humanity using well-crafted imagery with intellect. I have often felt this way thru-out my younger life. I was (am) independent, but guys wanted to capture me & own me. I still hear all the time: "it's too bad someone as pretty as you never got married!" I love that you're calling out this ownership behavior . . . it seems archaic, but it still happens all the time! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 1 Year Ago



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Added on August 3, 2012
Last Updated on April 17, 2021


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