Words are fickle

When you see that I'm stuck,get me out. Don't pretend you never saw me.

One moment I'm deep in the water,

i'm tip-toing on the border of my terrace the next.

Some are there to care a little,

no one to care enough .

The air is pure , the vibe but toxic.

The words are fickle,

the intentions but mettalic.

The hand to help me out from the water is wavering.

The push, but intent.

I tried to be righteous,

my knees but bent.

I was sailing across the shores of hell one moment .

And now,

to the paradise i'm sent.

Author's Note

Here's a short poem .Do let me know what you think about this .I've tried something different this time.

Reviews

[T.S. Ulmus]

I read it through four times, can't say I'm sure what it's about, but can't say that I care for understanding. It reads like slow jazz, it's a beautiful piece that uses words to paint an emotion. You did an amazing job defining something only by its edges. I'd like to read a lot more by you, it seems that you're free-writes would be magnificent, pure emotion and expression.

[Ankita Dwivedi]

Mind can be a very dark and dangerous organ,sometimes.Sometimes,it holds on to a thought and it can go to any point to feed the thought .i am delighted by your words and really hope that i never dissapoint you .
love,Ankita

[T.S. Ulmus]

You could never disappoint me. Spill your words, refine them if you must, a true poet bleeds emotion into words. As long as you are true you will create beautiful works.

[Lorry]

Strangely, I am currently sitting in car as the rain is too heavy to drive in and I only an hour ago had the thought that my view of the dips and curves of hill and dale will have a new addition if this keeps up... A LAKE! 😀
It would be nice to float or paddle in, but everyone needs the reassurance at some time of a helping hsnd reaching out to help us stay above water.
It is always easier to ask than stay silent, not the other way around. What's the worst could happen asking someone if they are okay? Slight embarrassment? One more person looking at you oddly? I think we can survive that.
If only we could treat everyone like they are just another version of us playing out a different role....what a wonderful world that would be 😀
Nicely captured. Flows really well and not a word out of place... A goldilocks poem... Just right 😀

[Ankita Dwivedi]

i can feel you speaking from such a kiind and generous heart .i loved you saying ,'another odd stare .we can survive that'.thanks for your words .let's together make this world better with ink that stands out and words that are tickimng time-bomb to disguised haters.
love,Ankita

[Sami Khalil]

Very powerful.
Words and emotions conveyed mirror the status the poetess was going through at that stage. Some people feel our suffering, some are indifferent. A helping hand is a balm to many suffering people.

[Ankita Dwivedi]

I completely agree.thanks for visiting .
love,Ankita:)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome dear poet.

[Chris Shaw]

I understood these lines to say there were those available to help, they certainly saw and heard, but did nothing in a situation where a death could have been prevented. That is callous beyond belief. Strong write Ankita.

Chris

[Ankita Dwivedi]

People don't care enough many-a-times,unless they find themselves in that situation.Mind is a very dangerous organ and we never know when it will hold on to a thought and how far a mind can go with that thought.We need to look around and help people .Can i sleep at night thinking i could prevent something from happening and i didn't ?
Many thanks for visiting, sir .
-Ankita:)

[Chris Shaw]

I am a she by the way. Christine, I call myself Chris :)

[Ankita Dwivedi]

Oh s**t.i am so sorry ma'am. Me*embarrassed. 🐣🐣hope I didn't offend you. ❣

[Chris Shaw]

Not at all. Us sisters have to stick together :))

[Ankita Dwivedi]

Oh! This is my line. 'us girls have got to stick together'. I see we have got something in common. :)

[genocide]

Very good poetry on being deep in the water.

[Ankita Dwivedi]

many thanks ,friend.
;)