My Cathedral

My Cathedral

A Poem by Melanie Genevieve

Father wakes up dead every morning
trapped in a house he doesn’t recognize 
the door swings wide more often than it used to
but floors beneath him remain the same
fuzzy orange carpet (just the way he likes it)
thick and dull so you don’t hear the sounds


Father comes home with lead in his shoes
dragging his anxieties like three screaming toddlers 
they’ve grown a lot since he first started working
from cool-aid and freeze pops to vodka and condoms 

He comes home 
exhausted of paying for their 

"mistakes"


walk 

through 

the 

door

The pressure bursts


Voice pounding in my ears like fists
repetitive banging of symbols and drums 
vibrates down to my spine, crushing me
shaking the foundation I’ve been re-building.

I don’t feel it anymore, you’ve already eroded me
eroded me with your constant crash


Why isn’t anything I do ever good enough?


fighting with you is like yelling in a cathedral 
at the top of my lungs  
all echos, no answers


Bells ring, it’s that hour again
more than the neighbors turn their heads 
mother cries, sister hides, brother bides his time
they wait for the moment of silence 
the end of the ringing

© 2013 Melanie Genevieve


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Reviews

Sounds like it derives from agonizing, personal experience. I really liked it, especially the first part, which seemed more resignated and "cynical".
You intrigued me by the very first, brilliantly-thought out stanza, which is both chilling and tragicomic.
I think you've managed to create some very original and powerful images. Among my favorite-lines are(including the first stanza):

"the door swings wide more often than it used to"
"Father comes home with lead in his shoes
dragging his anxieties like three screaming toddlers"

Very captivating and....disquieting
A splendid reading-experience!

K.

Posted 6 Years Ago


very good poem, nice rhythm to it, Imagery is vivid and beautiful and the finish is well done certainly got me thinking.

Posted 6 Years Ago


This is one interesting write and I truly enjoyed, Thank you for sharing

Posted 6 Years Ago


Created a vivid movie where all characters and structure appear very natural.
Expressed eloquently and charmed with your talented style.
Enjoyed reading.

Posted 7 Years Ago


This is an excellent poem. Your imagery is taut and your perspective is fresh. I like this piece very much.

Father comes home with lead in his shoes
dragging his anxieties like three screaming toddlers

I look forward to reading more of you.

Posted 7 Years Ago


loved the structure here, great details, and awesome finish! wonderful piece :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


i like the use of Cathedral in the title, and Father as in priest father or my father...and he comes home after being worn down by three kids...maybe he was abusive maybe not...but this child has grown and seems to have been the good one...but only gets berated, paying for the sins of the other children and the father himself..

at least that is what i saw here...marvelous piece of writing.. so damn intense.

Posted 7 Years Ago


In a way, this one reminds of a song called "King of Carrot Flowers Part 1" by Neutral Milk Hotel. You show us the heart of urban decay and the effect it has on a family. The buildup of all of the emotion was this one was really intense. I think your similes and descriptions shine. I was captivated by these lines: like three screaming toddlers /they’ve grown a lot since he first started working/from cool-aid and freeze pops to vodka and condoms ."

Also, your simile in stanza seven is amazing. It really changes the way I think of cathedrals. Also, it creates a really potent atmosphere around the conversation taking place in this poem.

Posted 7 Years Ago


"fighting with you is like yelling in a cathedral
at the top of my lungs
all echos, no answers"
This just really resonated with me. All your writing is so beautifully vulnerable and honest, I really love it! For me being completely open and honest in my writing is difficult so I admire you're ability to do it so well. This poem evokes such emotion with the vivid imagery, it's so amazing!

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on July 22, 2013
Last Updated on July 26, 2013

Author

Melanie Genevieve
Melanie Genevieve

Freeport, NY



About
I used to keep my poetry private until my good friend Shabad encouraged me to read a poem (Curiosity) out loud at Sip This Cafe in Valley Stream. Since then I decided to make my writing public and ge.. more..

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