Now

Now

A Poem by Benjamin L. Weekly

I was looking through a clear glass window
Now it's shattered.
I was living in a shell of happiness
Now it's cracked.

She was safe in the tower we built
Now she's alone.
We were happy painting our lives together
Now it chips away.

Together we made a giant happy face
Now a pool of tears.
Apart just isn't the same as before
Now I regret what I've done.

Together we were a picture
Now we're just puzzle pieces
Without her I'm incomplete
Now I need her.

© 2008 Benjamin L. Weekly


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it struck me that if a window is made of glass the only time you need to mention what type of glass it is would be if that is going to be out of the norm -- for instance frosted glass; clear glass is a description as redundant as white milk. the simple imagery of the first two stanzas although not providing the most novel insight into a situation did work. the third stanza, i have to say, with the giant happy face did appear quite funny and i don't think this was the intention. the last stanza again has simplicity and directness on it's side but the imagery is second hand light which doesn't illuminate the subject as much as a less tried and tested image might.

Posted 17 Years Ago


4 of 4 people found this review constructive.




Reviews


It is amazing how we become good enough to stand alone as we grow up. Then we meet that one person, and lose half of ourself to that person - and can no longer stand alone.
Your heart comes out in this poem. I do not know what happened to sepperate you two, but I hope that it all works out for the best.
Great writing.

Posted 17 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

love.

Posted 17 Years Ago


2 of 3 people found this review constructive.


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Added on April 25, 2008

Author

Benjamin L. Weekly
Benjamin L. Weekly

Roseburg, OR



About
I am 22 years old and live in Roseburg, OR. I presently work full time. At my job, I handle second tier tech support by phone and answer emails for a major company. As such, I have the privilege of.. more..

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