I thought

I thought you were the one for me 

but how wrong could I be 

seeing you used to make my heart stutter 

now your  name makes me shudder 

blood running down my wrist like a river 

thanks my old friend the razor 

pain in my chest caused by you 

not knowing if I can go on 

you left without even a good reason 

wondering what I did was so wrong 

I thought you were going to be my forever 

now I am left wondering where I went wrong 

is there something wrong with me that 

everyone leaves for some odd reason 

am I so unlovable that I am doomed 

to be alone for all time 

so  I found another for me to be with

I thought she would see me for who I am 

and accept the monster I have become 

yet again I wrong she left with no reason 

here I am alone again the darkness sets in 

I thought I would find love and happiness

but I guess I thought wrong 

Reviews

[Laura Kate]

Such deep emotion, as are the wounds and the hurt you are describing, and many will be able to relate (what really helped me was writing poetry and feeling understood by wonderful writers right here on Writerscafe! )

'seeing you used to make my heart stutter
now your name makes me shudder ' - really strong.

'blood running down my wrist like a river
thanks my old friend the razor' - imagery is strong too - I really hope that the protagonist will find more comfort in their poetry than in the razor :)

Keep writing!
Laura

[JR]

I think this is a pretty universal feeling, especially after the loss of an important relationship. You did a good job capturing that feeling in plain language, so your reader can be easily drawn in. "... accept the monster I have become" that's a powerful image. That's what we really want, isn't? Someone who can love us despite the damage.

[Lorry]

Like wearing a stamp on our forehead, invisible to ourselves, but like a flashing neon sign to others, that would state something along the line of "lovefool" or something more sinister.
When it keeps happening, we doubt ourself to an extent that thoughts scream that it must somehow be our fault and then they turn sinister and throw us down a spiral staircase of despair and self loathing.
So do we turn to the darkside like the rest, treating others as badly, or do we fight for the strength to stay being ourselves. Easier said than done.
Dont let darkness swallow you, it is a b***h and a half to escape once snared.

[Curtis.Lenker]

Thanks for the review. I embrace my darkness. Its like the only friend that I have ever had.