Tea Girl And Kettle Lad In: A Not So Lazy Weekend

Tea Girl And Kettle Lad In: A Not So Lazy Weekend

A Story by Nitsua

Tea Girl is drained from the past few days of being a hero and needs her alone time, so Kettle Lad goes out for a night on the town. But it will be a COLD day in hell before crime sleeps in Dortopolis

It had been a long week for Tea Girl, and Kettle Lad knew it. From stopping a bank heist to saving a family, she had been drained for quite some time now. It was the weekend and there were other heroes visiting Dortopolis, so it was perfectly fine to take a break. 
“ Okay doll, enjoy your time alone! I’m going to go to a fashion show out of town, maybe I’ll come back with a few new dresses. For me of course. “ Kettle Lad flipped his hair as he was putting on some high heels. Tea Girl was so drained from the week that she just nodded and went back to reading her comic book. Kettle Lad took no offense in this lack of acknowledgement, as he knew how his partner was. Kettle Lad thought of her as a computer of sorts, able to provide countless hours of fun and had a multitude of skills, but would overheat from constant use, and needed breaks from everything from time to time. It took him a while to understand and accept this, but after almost a decade of knowing her, had accepted this as part of her personality and just another thing to cherish. Though they depended on each other, especially in the line of duty, though were perfectly sufficient without each other, for a little while at least. These days of separation were healthy for the both of them.

Kettle Lad had put on his shoes and pranced out the door, flamboyantly yodeling:
“ I’ll be back in a few days darling, toodles~ “ and with a twirl and a skip, he was off on a trip away from their shared apartment. 

Tea Girl sighed and turned the page of her comic book. It was of her favorite series, Elemental 7. In the story, the main character was a girl named Illumaria, whose hair was scarlet as blood and skin as fair as the snow that melts beneath her feet in the winter.She was about as womanly and shy as a turtle is fast. She defied all stereotypes of women in her tribe of fire, and for that was an outcast when she refused to change. She did not care what more or less anyone thought of her and was a free spirit A rowdy and rambunctious pyromaniac who loved to drink and holler, she would go as far to streak across the forest in her birthday suit, drunk as a skunk rapping chants of an african priestess. Why one may ask? In her own words “ because I can” It was her catch phrase and her motto of living. What made her  an even more interesting character was her significant other, who was the exact opposite of her in almost every way. 

His name was Nitsua, a blue haired boy who was more or less straight as a rainbow and a hydro mage, one who controlled water. He liked to pretend he was a mermaid and wear sea shell bras while he used his water controlling powers to splash against his pale bare skin. However, he had a different side to him as well. One could say, a goth side. As if diagnosed with multiple personality disorder, he loved to dye his azure hair black and silver, to symbolize the relationship between light and darkness. He would go from someone even more flamboyant than Kettle Lad to Mr dark and mysterious, at least in appearance, for he was still the same fabulous and eccentric boy on the inside, all the time, and it really bothered him. Like Illumaria, he was also outcasted from his tribe for being himself. He however, did not take this well at all unlike Illumaria. 

They met in the forest one night and were together ever since. Despite not liking him at all at first, Illumaria grew fond of Nitsua over the years and began to like him, and eventually, love him. Their relationship was very weird however, for if Illumaria ever touched Nitsua for more than 5 secondsl Nitsua would evaporate in her arms. This was fine for Illumaria for she wasn’t the lovey dovey kind, but for Nitsua however, was a fatal flaw as sometimes he really needed a hug. Even holding hands for a second caused great pain for the hydromancer. And though their elements and personalities greatly crashed, they were the true meaning of “ opposites attract “ 

After about a decade or so, in the comic and in real time, for Tea Girl had been following this series since before the time she met Kettle Lad, she had been hooked on the story. The non sexualized romance, the tale of 2 outcasts going against all odds to survive on their own and eventually build a super village of fellow strays, she it was her all time favorite saga, and in ways, felt like she could relate to it a lot. She desired so badly to be as confident and outgoing as Illumaria, but despite all of her efforts she never even came close. She hated herself for a while because of it, but after a while grew to accept and lived on. Though she doesn’t really like herself that much, she was loved by another and tried her best to smile, no matter how hard things got. And despite a few downfalls here and there, with a little help she always got back on her feet and kept on trucking on. 

She continued to read Elemental 7 till the dead of night, passing out underneath her blanket with a book covering her face, her body half way dangling off the couch as she began to dream about her and Kettle Lad as Illumaria and Nitsua respectively….

Meanwhile a few towns over, Kettle Lad, who was in his Sunday Best ( despite it being Saturday night ) was enjoying his night on the town. Tight jean shorts and a leather shirt exposing his midriff was his attire for having fun. Nails done like a rainbow and blue lipstick caressing his mouth, with his hair done like some sort of video gamer. Walking in his high heels, joined the crowd to watch the fashion show, eyes glued to models as they walked and turned, twirling and displaying their outfits. About an hour passed before Kettle Lad felt a chill in the air. Not of danger, but from how cold it was outside. It was a warm 90 degrees when he arrived, which also supported the reason for dressing so skimpy, so it was very queer, more so than he was, that it would grow so cold. Everyone in the auditorium started to shiver. Kettle Lad knew something was up, he shifted his way through the crowd and out the door to investigate. 

Bumping against many people on the way, his anxiety began to rise. He was usually the more calm between him and Tea Girl, but  in fact he was just as much as a “ loser “ as she was. But he knew just because they had issues didn’t make them losers, everyone had their flaws, and him and Tea Girl was no exception. It didn’t help that in case something was up, he couldn’t use his  power of technology spawning.  After about 10 minutes of fighting the crowd he arrived outside, it was snowing hard outside, difficult was an understatement when it came to walking in the snow in such flimsy footwear.” I have to look gorgeous, even if it hinders me “ he said.. The icy sky powder scantily clad feet as he walked outside, the streets were strangely quiet and empty, cloaked in snow. He looked up at the moon and rubbed his arms, trying to keep himself warm. At that moment he saw the cause of the freak snow storm, it was hard to make out, but after further examination it appeared to be a flying weather machine. The shadow of a figure stood on top of the flying manipulator. The machine started to descend towards Kettle Lad, the weather around him growing colder and colder until he was shaking up a storm. The machine landed and the figure stepped off. It was a man dressed in head to toe in a snow suit, the only part exposed was his face, which was partially gilded by a grizzly beard. He stepped off the machine and pushed the helpless Nitsua into the snow, too cold to fight back. 
“ I am Ice Drake! My intentions are simple, to freeze this little fashion show in place and steal the millions of dollars worth of clothing right off the racks, and their bodies! I don’t care of every person here has to be stripped bare, if they have a nice outfit, it’s mine! I have no complex back story or motive besides COLD hard cash! I think I’ll start with you, pretty boy. “ 
Ice Drake laughed and hovered his hand towards Kettle Lad’s top, gripping it at the neck as he began to pull. Kettle Lad, who was unconscious from the lack of warmth he possessed was a goner. Or so it would seem. For when the leather began to tear off his chest, it ignited a deep rage within the beauty obsessed man, as well as a lacy purple bra. Eyes snapping open despite being seemingly froze shut, his limbs began to bend, as if on their own to combat Ice Drake. His heel pushing so far into Ice Drake’s throat that the shock asphyxiated him, knocking him out as cold as the environment he had created. The weather machine still continued to blow, however, and was Kettle Lad’s next objective. Fueled by sheer willpower, he pushed his limits to use his technological knowledge to shut down the machine. It was a race against time as his organs began to slowly shut down. His vision blurry and his head light, he crossed the final few wires before passing out completely, the last thing he saw was snow melting around him, the last thing he heard was the cheer of a large crowd. 

Saturday night bled into Sunday morning, and Sunday morning faded into the afternoon and finally where the day of rest would meet Monday before Kettle Lad woke up. Nose runny and throat raw, a terrible headache caused him to close his eyes the second he opened them in excruciating pain. He faded back into sleep until the sun awoke him hours later. Still feeling like on the brink of death, he awoke in the bottom bunk of the bunk bed he shared with Tea Girl. Forcing himself to crawl out of bed, he noticed he was dressed in his warm pink bathrobe. Bewilderment dressed his face before realization struck, causing him to blush. Trying to ignore what may have happened while he was knocked out cold, literally and figuratively, he saw a letter on his desk between his 2 favorite Giant Robot figurines. He stumbled over towards the desk and examined the letter. “ For Kettle Lad “ was on the front of the letter, followed by the drawing of an angry face. Puzzled, he opened the letter and began to read a wall of frustratedly written words.

“ You baka! You almost got yourself killed! I was asleep, happily dreaming of adventure when I got a knock on the door. Several well dressed people carried your barely dressed self in their arms and explained to me what happened. I know it all, and I want to tell you that when you aren’t wearing your gown you should NOT be fighting crime! There were plenty of other heroes in the area, including supreme celery, but no you had to be mister big shot and try to do everything by yourself. Want to know the worst part? I didn’t get to be lazy at all on Sunday because I had to take care of your reckless butt! You owe me big time Nitsua because if it wasn’t for me taking care of you, you would be 6 feet under by now.” 
The letter continued, but more sloppily written, a circular  stain or 2 of  were engraved on the paper.
“ The reward money had to go toward cold medicine and chicken noodle soup for you. We are back on duty today, but I can handle stuff by myself, just don’t even expect me to wave due to how tired I’ll be, and by how mad I am at you. I hope you’re happy with yourself, dork. “

Tears started to well up in Kettle Lad’s eyes at the stress he caused his partner, it was obvious how mad she was at him, at least, it was until he re-read the entire letter.
“ Nitsua? Wait… Heh… and she calls me the dork “ he said to himself and smiled, realizing that Tea Girl was heavily influenced by her comic book idol, Illumaria. Still, he felt bad about all the stressed he caused her on her unwinding time. He motioned the letter towards the inside of his desk, turning it around as he folded it, he noticed something written, very very small on the back, as if meant to be missed and only written to get get it off her chest. He squinted his sore eyes and read out loud:
“Get well soon” 
He smiled as he noticed at the far far bottom corner, there was a microscopic, barely noticeable symbol hastily drawn. 
A rare showing of Tea Girl’s inner feelings, a heart. 

Kettle Lad blushed and giggled as he walked towards the kitchen to heat up some soup, still coughing out his lungs. 

Far away in town, Tea Girl was taking a break patrolling the city, sitting down at a MoonDeer Tea Shop reading the paper. With tired, heavy eyes, she began to flip through the paper, struggling to stay awake. At the brink of collapsing due to sleep deprivation; an article caught her attention. A slight grin painted her face as she took a sip of tea, then read to herself quietly.

“ Half naked drag queen saves fashion show, freezes villain in his tracks. “

© 2016 Nitsua

Author's Note

Any feedback is much appreciated! Still inexperienced in the way of word art. The Elemental 7 stuff is a reference to another series I'm involved in.

If you've read the previous 2 Tea Girl And Kettle Lad adventures, did the ending make you say " aww " ?

Thanks in advance!

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Added on February 21, 2016
Last Updated on February 21, 2016
Tags: tea, teagirl, kettlelad, heroes, funny, comedy, romance, fluff, fabulous, drag, snow, fashion



Hot Springs, AR

Hello, I'm Austin, age 21 from Arkansas. I'm ashamed to say that I'm not exactly the best writer, my grammar isn't top notch and my punctuation is subpar, but I have a lot of ideas I would love to sha.. more..