Hope Will Fall Tonight With Broken Wings

It was over before I knew what was happening.

Faster than I could think to move out of the way, my friend held the gun to my head and pulled the trigger. I fell, the bullet sinking through my skull dragging my body along with it. When I opened my eyes, I felt no pain, but I knew I was dead. I watched as the gun fell from my friend's limp hand. He acted shocked, but I knew this was going to happen.

White silence, so peaceful, so numb.

In a single instant, someone can drastically change time and not even know it.

And now for me, everything is gone. Everyone is gone. You're all gone to me. I've been pulled away from what should be my peaceful eternal sleep to watch the lives of my loved ones play out. I watch you, holding my picture to your chest. I listen to you sob 'Matt, why you?' and I want to stay.

I need to stay.

But the choice was not mine. My fate was decided for me, by someone I once called a friend. Moving on was such somber bliss. I didn't get to say goodbye, because even as I fell I was already awakening in the world of the dead. And now I must watch from afar as my mother sheds tears for her broken son.

No! This is not how things should have been! Man and his fetish of violence had stopped time in its tracks, altered the courses of my fate. What we once thought to be destiny-for us to be together forever-has been shattered.

I hear you calling my name, but try as you might-as much as we both wish it could be true-you cannot erase what has been done. You must close your eyes or look away, for fate has exposed my soul, and I cannot stay with you. Oh, but how I wish I could. How I wish I could live to see the day where we become 'Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Sanders', because-just so you know-I was planning on proposing. And our children...oh how beautiful our children would have been. I wish I could be there with you, to start a family and grow old together. But fate chose a different path for me. The hope of our hearts and souls will fall tonight with broken wings, descending eternity in me.

As I watch over you, I want to scream out to you that I love you. But death has taken my voice away from me and it seems the more I listen, the more I have to say.

Reviews

[Devine Miss C]

I love this. You write really well. Very dramatic. For extra drama, you could shorten your paragraphs say "...and pulled the trigger. I fell, the bullet ..."

I would have ended at ".. and pulled the trigger." New paragraph. "I fell." New paragraph "The bullet sinking..." By starting a new paragraph the reader is forced to stop. The shorter sentences, rather than flow on, add extra punch. The same thing could be said for the second to last one. But that is just a personal preference.

[shedevil]

it was wonderful! but im confusied is the protaginest male or female? at frist i thought it was a she, bu then you taked about grief for a son and i thought ook slly me but towards the end you metioned proposing to a mathew so im thinking is a man love story? if you could please resond it wuld be helpful

[Sebastiaan van de Bund]

Fantastic. Powerful, beautifully written and very intense. The words seem to fit perfectly into each other. Wow :)

[gottenbetter]

This is riveting piece. Beautifully painted and emotionally charged. It is fantastic.

[Jill Wallflower]

Whoa! This was so intense yet so good! I loved every second of it. :)