The rise and fall of life's notes

The rise and fall of life's notes

A Poem by S.zaynab.kamoonpury
"

Didactic poetic

"
Take life for an escalator
Go both through its ups
and downs
Ride it like on an elevator
Expect both smiles and
frowns.

Take life for a suspense
novel
you and I unaware what
the next day will hold
Meditate and muse, or
this book of life just
peruse
Pore over it to watch
life's mysteries unfold.

Take life for the open sea
But pray drown not
yourself in it
lest you lose sight of
God's shore
and thereby lose all
spiritual wit.

Take life for a candle
let its glow illumine
others too
and in each and every of
its flicker
Try finding a hint or clue

Each soul's life unique as
mazes of one's
thumbprint
And usually for many
life's quite an uphill battle
At times sweet as
molasses, at times bitter
as mint
and life's roller coaster
may shake you like a rattle.

Life tis like the rise and
fall of musical notes
Consoling to find people
in the same boats
Up and down, like on a violin
Sometimes you lose,
sometime you win
We are better off
if we commit less sin

Thus ponder over your
life and reflect
how good you've been
to it
and not just how it's
been treating you
Veer around the pit, and
keep your path lit
for darkness of the soul
is for you unfit.

Take it in its stride even if it's a bittersweet life
Downhill's a joy ride, uphill has to be strife

© 2020 S.zaynab.kamoonpury


Author's Note

S.zaynab.kamoonpury
Click on top side pic to zoom pic

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Reviews

You have a nice touch with meter and rhyme.

In modern English poetry the best poets avoid archaic inversions like:

But pray drown not
yourself in it

We would say something like:

But pray don't drown
yourself in it

Or perhaps:

But please don't drown
yourself in it

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Ooh wow it's nice to hear from a well known poet like you that many of us have seen writing in many .. read more
Michael R. Burch

3 Years Ago

I think there were many great poets in the past and there have been some great poets in recent years.. read more
This poem has a close affinity to my view on life at the present moment. Havent been on line much ..
been in my own cocoon...faced with the uncertainity of the future. I expect most of us are. Good to have your poem as a 'pick me up' encouraging us to face our realities. Thank you for dropping by on my page Stay safe

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Hi dear poetess, im glad my poem is relatable and uplifting in these times, that is my intent always.. read more
kitty

3 Years Ago

Blessings!
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Gee
Life is indeed a rollercoaster ride hopefully with more ups than downs. Well expressed piece

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Thanks soo much for your great conclusive comment, yes that's a genuine hope of all to have more hig.. read more
"Life tis like the rise and
fall of musical notes
Consoling to find people
in the same boats"

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

"Take life for a suspense
novel
you and I unaware what
the next day will hold"

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very realistic, wise and uplifting Z. We all have to go through those trials and tribulations, some learn lessons and correct the course, others keep falling into the abyss. Life is a miracle and a blessing from high above and we need to cherish it, enjoy it, share its bounties and help each other along the way.

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Good morn, thanks soo much brother poet for great comment, your words sum this poem in a refreshing .. read more
Sami Khalil

3 Years Ago

Whoa!. I love it. You are welcome. Keep up the good work.
I have often thought life like a roller-coaster. There are the highs and lows as well as the inbetweens. Life is what we make it. We have to take the rough with the smooth. It is certainly not going to be plain sailing. I really enjoyed how you approached this poem Zay Zay and the different approaches you have used to look at our journey. I like the way you think and you have done yourself proud. Good to read you again my friend. I also enjoyed looking at your posted images.ove the one of the wavy road.

Chris

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Hi good morn Chris, your bright eloquent words added to my poem nicely, so poetically, life is highs.. read more
A discerning life philosophy.
The best experiences are had by those who frequently remind themselves that life is a miracle--
all of it.
Lovely sentiments and deep insights.
Well done!

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Yeahh man i strongly believe life is a miracle and so beautiful despite the challenges, so full of r.. read more
A series of similes that speak of experience. Life does have its ups and downs ... its heroes and clowns ... its smiles and frowns. It is how we handle them that makes the difference.

Well written and enjoyable

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Hey poet I like your poetic comment in tune with my message. Thanks soo much for your super comment!
This is a very enjoyable & insightful poem with a string of well-presented metaphors for life's ups & downs & lessons. Your rhyme & rhythm bounce along with an upbeat style so reading this imparts that feeling of being uplifted by the words. In one place I felt a little stretch for the rhyme: "may shake you like a rattle" -- seems like a badly-fitting pair of metaphors (roller coaster & baby rattle). You could improve with a slight change: "may shake you 'til you rattle." This has just the right amount of "giving advice on how to live" -- but not too preachy about it, just sharing one's truth about how it feels when you're accepting what comes (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 3 Years Ago


S.zaynab.kamoonpury

3 Years Ago

Hi margie, I'm glad you like my metaphors,.
Thanks for the suggestion your line sounds nice .. read more

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31 Reviews
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Added on July 18, 2020
Last Updated on July 19, 2020
Tags: Life, spiritual

Author

S.zaynab.kamoonpury
S.zaynab.kamoonpury

About
I like to call myself a poetess even though I'm no professional or conventional at writing poetry. Have been writing poems for some time and readers say they get message and/or entertainment from the.. more..

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