With My Honor Intact

Sunlight seeped through the cracks in the wall a week later, and Jorlin stirred, half asleep. When she remembered her promise to visit Asher the day before, she quickly got up and went downstairs. She swiftly exited the tavern and took a deep breath of the crisp morning air before setting out northwards at a steady jog. Dew clung to the grass and sparkled as it caught the early sun’s rays. When she arrived at the cluster of thatched houses at the center of town, she noticed that nobody was around. The serfs were already out in the fields. Asher usually worked in the corn fields, so she took a left when she reached a fork in the road. On her right, long waves of grain bent in the gentle breeze. A couple farmers passed by, carting loads of harvested crops. She was breathing heavily by the time she reached the corn field, so she slowed to a brisk walk before climbing the low wooden fence of the field. It was hard to see amongst the tall stalks of corn.

“Ash!” she called, moving stalks out of her way as she stepped through the rows. “Ash, where are you?”

She made her way through a few more rows until she heard his familiar voice call out, “Jay?”

As Jorlin walked through another row, she saw him standing up ahead with a sack around his shoulder, stuffed with the corn he was gathering. He smiled instantly as he saw her burst through the leafy stalks.

“Hello, Jay,” he greeted with a smile, the former weariness on his face vanishing.

“Hey, Ash. How’s work today?” she asked, though she already knew the answer.

“Hard, as usual,” he mumbled. “Clovis expects too much from us. We can’t keep up with his demands anymore.”

“Next he’ll be asking us to pay him in our limbs, not just in crops,” she joked.

“Aye!” he agreed with a laugh, setting the sack full of corn on the ground. He puffed out his chest and declared in a mocking voice, “Give me all your possessions! I can’t afford the latest clothing trends yet!”

Jorlin laughed and broke off a long stem from a corn stalk nearby and held it out at arm’s length. “Never!” she shouted in a deep voice, struggling not to smile and stay in character.

Asher did the same, and bellowed, “You dare to challenge the mighty Clovis?”

“Aye! For Auld Town!” she cried, then leapt forward, batting at Asher’s stalk with her own.

Asher made a purposefully weak attempt to block her blows, and when she whacked his arm he dropped his weapon and held his arm with his other hand.

“Ah!” he sobbed, falling to his knees. “You’ve cut off my arm!”

“Surrender!” she demanded, the end of her stalk at his neck.

“I s’pose I must, for if you kill me there won’t be a coffin within a hundred miles that could be expensive enough for me!”

Jorlin dropped her stalk as she doubled over laughing. For a while, she had forgotten anything bad in the world.  

A chilly wind picked up and made the corn stalks sway.

“What’re you doing?” Asher asked when Jorlin suddenly began picking corn and stuffing it in his bag.

“Helping you finish early,” she replied, already filling her arms full of fresh corn.

“But-…”

“Nope, like it or not I’m helping you,” she said, smiling.

He shook his head with a grin of his own, and she gratefully helped him finish his daily work early. The two were soon rhythmically harvesting the corn, and their combined efforts made the task go by quickly. It was a pleasant day for working in the fields; the sunlight made the chilly breeze not as bitter. Conversation helped the time to pass faster as well. By evening Jorlin and Asher were walking south, the setting sun casting long shadows as they made their way back towards town.

Jorlin took a deep breath and inhaled all the scents around her. Asher said she had the nose of a dog, as she relied on her sense of smell more than most. She took in his familiar scent, which smelled like grass and barley mixed with earth, tinged with the scent of crushed pine needles. His aroma felt like home. The gentle breeze carried a touch of winter, and smelled faintly like smoke and grass. A wind blew from behind them; it had the waft of something foreign. That was when she realized she heard heavy footsteps and the clop of horse hooves coming from behind. Jorlin noticed that Asher had already stopped, and was turned the other way, so she came to a halt a few paces after he did.

A half-dozen or so armored soldiers led by a man on a black charger halted at his command. Jorlin quickly made her way to Asher’s side.

“What are you doing away from the fields?” the man asked. He sat stiffly on the horse, which tossed its head impatiently.

“I got done early,” Asher replied, his voice sounding different.

The man atop the horse, obviously a general, looked both of them over for a moment. “How old are you, boy?” he asked, his voice emotionless. His face was grim and commanding, and he had a haughty air about him.

Don’t tell him, don’t tell him, don’t tell him, Jorlin thought. “Asher,” she whispered. “Don’t…” her voice trailed off and she didn’t make an effort to finish, because she already knew what he was going to say. He was honorable; stubborn, but honorable.

“Seventeen,” Asher answered, not taking his eyes off of the general.

Jorlin’s heart dropped down to her toes, and she instinctively grabbed his arm.

No, she thought. No no no no no no no no. Her eyes watered, and she blinked a few times to make the world around her clear again.

“You know what that means,” the general said, looking almost annoyed. “Fall in at the back, you’re coming with me.”

“But,” Asher’s voice stopped for a moment. “I have no provisions, and my family, they won’t know where I am.”

The man made a gesture toward Jorlin, “She could tell them for you. Now come along; I don’t want to have to force you. It’s been a long day and I’m sure you’ll cooperate.”

Asher turned to say goodbye to her, but she stepped in front of him.

“Don’t take him away! Please!” She hated how her voice sounded.

The general rolled his eyes, and Asher pulled Jorlin back.

“I really don’t have time for any of this foolishness,” he growled. “I will not say it again. Come with me, boy.”

Asher dropped his gaze, and whispered, “I’m sorry Jorlin. I hope you won’t be bitter at me for doing the honorable thing.”

She opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. Helplessly, she watched

as he slowly walked over to the group of soldiers. The general touched the side of the horse with the spur on his boot, and the patrol resumed walking with Asher at the back. When she was sure he wasn’t looking, Jorlin ran up to Asher’s side and began walking with him.

“Look what you’ve gotten yourself into this time, you idiot,” she hissed, trying to cover up the grief she felt with anger. “You should have just lied.”

“Jorlin,” he whispered, “it would be wrong of me to lie. If I’m going to die, then at least let me die with my honor intact.”

His voice sounded different. He seemed to be speaking to her as a father consoling a child. His face gave away no emotion, but she could read what he was feeling through his eyes. He was trying to stay strong in front of her, but she knew him too well.

“Since I’m leaving, you have to promise me something,” he said.

“And what’s that?” The words came out of her mouth angrier than she intended.

“Promise me that you won’t change when I’m gone, alright?”

Jorlin was surprised at the annoyance that flared up inside her chest. “You know I can’t promise that. There’s no way that I can be the same with you gone.”

Asher sighed tiredly, and all of Jorlin’s emotions were replaced with an acute sympathy. He didn’t deserve this.

Finally, she said, “I’ll try. But you have to promise me something.”
“What?”

“Don’t die.”

“I’ll do my best,” he replied wryly, but somehow that didn’t console her at all.

The general abruptly turned around on his horse, eyes furious and locked onto Jorlin.

“Get out of my line, serf,” he commanded. She flinched at the forcefulness of his voice. “Now.”

She didn’t realize that she had stopped walking until the patrol was halfway to the next bend in the road. Asher turned around to look at her one last time, his face grim.

Jorlin realized she was sniffling, and she wiped her nose on the back of her hand.

No, no crying. Not now, she thought.

Despite her attempts to stay emotionless, the abrupt and utter loneliness that bombarded her made her eyes water. It wasn’t long before the tears spilled out and rolled down her cheeks. The fact that Asher was gone didn’t make sense; it didn’t register. She slowly and numbly began to trudge down the path towards her house. Several different times she realized Asher wasn’t beside her, which brought fresh waves of emotions. Jorlin desperately tried to make herself stop sniffling and somehow keep the tears at bay, but her attempts were futile. Soon her lingering footsteps accelerated into a walk, then a fast march. She sped up to a trot, then a jog, and before she realized it she was sprinting. Her long hair flew behind her and she sniffled feverishly as her breaths shortened.

She burst through the door of the tavern just as the sun slipped below the horizon. Paying no heed to the odd looks coming from the people in the bar, she stumbled around the tables, her vision blurry from tears. She made it up the stairs, and when her mother saw her she knew what had happened. Jorlin could tell by the look on her face. Before her mother could say anything, she hid in her room and fell onto her bed in a broken mess.