I figured it out

This poem is about a guy struggling with his feelings towards a girl. Shes had enough of his lies and is leaving him. While this is happening he realizes how much she means to him.

Along she came with her trembling hands

Crying a thousand rivers

She gently held me and said I'm leaving

I just smiled and said let go of me

 

Now words can not describe the way I'm feeling

I'm drowning in the sea

Swimming against the tide

Praying she'd change her mind and stay with me

 

I guess this time your really leaving

I've been serching in my head

For the words to make you stay

It wont be enough this time

Don't walk away and leave me needing

 

All my feelings are bottled inside

If they'd come out I'd be naked

But maybe they'll make you stay

 

You think that your a star the whole world revolves around you

But I can't be without you

You know you've got the power to crush my heart with your smile

No matter how much I'd try

You know I can't make drawings of you perfect enough

 

Now its over

I can't believe its over

I won't believe its over

I won't let it die

 

I'm losing my sense of wrong and right

Shaking from the pain thats in my head

I try to reach inside

But your in too deep

 

Not in a million years could I forget you

You can see it in my eyes I want you to stay

Please don't walk away

 

Forgive me for being too frank but I've never seen anything like you

I can't change yesterday

But I can promise you tomorrow

Why are you still walking away?

 

Its over now and I can't save you

But I'm alright I was playing with your head

I was lying when I said I loved you

But why do you look so good when your walking away

 

I only dream of you and you know it

Maybe you think your too good for me

No I can't let you go your a part of me know

 

Now I'm sitting here all alone

Trying to convice myself that I'm not losing you

And now I feel the pain inside

Because I'm without you

 

No matter how long it takes I would wait for you

Cause there's nothing in here but you

I'd wait a lifetime

I'd wait forever just to be with you

 

Take my life

Take my soul 

Take my heart

Just don't leave me now

 

Its an illusion how can I feel this way

Your vanished and I can no longer smell your scent

But I can't sleep at night

 

I can't let you go

I'm still under your spell

Caught by the taste of your lips

Your under my skin

 

Where are you now?

Though everythings been said and done

I still sit here thinking about you

No matter how hard I fight it

I can't denie it

 

Look at me now I've been up for nights

With my blood shot eyes

You don't even know

I'm still tangeled up in you

 

I can't let you go

I know I broke your heart

But baby I was wrong

If you can hear my heart thats barely breathing

Maybe you'll change your mind

 

So here I am

Standing on your porch

Begging for a second chance

Baby it doesn't matter if its wrong or right

I need your love to make me whole again

 

Reviews

[Matthew Kult]

very personal, very emotional. Course I think thats what everyone said so lets do something different.

Flow was off but it's not important. In my opinion, when your talking raw emotion, the piece should be raw to help portay that, and I am not sure if it was intentional but it works well here. Like someone said earlier I like the stages the emotions went through...I would like to have seen more of the aggression....could have been darker. I like the begging at the end. Great work

[Blossom]

Such strong emotions... this is really good.. I love feeling of the darkness and the sadness that is described unintentionally. Very good piece

[Wicahpi]

[r]

you can really feel the emotion in this, and it's sad and dark. i love how instead of accepting it, you had him going back to beg for her, very nice written, :)

[kuru]

very emotional i can feel you going through the denial/projection stages...i thought you'd end it off with accepting the loss... but you went back

[Sports Girl]

I really liked this poem it was so good. Theres a lot of emotion in it.

[deeps]

Though everythings been said and done
Look at me I've been up for nights
With my blood shot eyes
You don't even know
I'm still tangeled up in you

I so-loved these lines here. I can just feel the emotion tangle itself.
This is a very well written write.