21/08/16

Fleeting Thoughts #1

All the hotel receipts are fading

along with the structure of your face,

as I stay here pacing;

Your face melting in my hands.

Author's Note

Just random thoughts while I'm going about life. Didn't really have the time to elaborate on it.

Also first thing posted on here!! I don't even know if I'm doing this right.

Reviews

[Rahul]

ur "fleeting feelings" taste surprisingly quite gud. u must continue writing such juxtapositions of ur montage memories under "Fleeing Feel Diary" or as a Red Journal. it could be turn into somehing.. of courses as killer (beautious) as u r by now. not sure, if u r so much into writing novels or not but yeah... someday, u can think 'bout it too... u know.. 'bout turning such "fleeting 4way fatal feelings" in chapters.. in a gr8 novel.

kinda like ur work!

[Alice Poésy]

Will do! I plan to post certain thoughts on here I want to "immortalise" :).

Thank you for your advice and kind words! I actually am working on a series of short stories off here based on these thoughts and certain events. I'm not so sure about them for now, but I think they could have potential.

I'm so happy we crossed paths, Rahul! Your words are very encouraging :).

[Anastasia_Snow]

Lovely work, Alice! You painted a wonderful picture with only a few words. I really liked this - it was a great read. I think it is fine without elaboration. (I tend to write poems based on random thoughts, as well. I often find that these become some of my favorites of the things I have written.)
Wonderful poem, a very nice read. Great work, Alice.

[Alice Poésy]

Thank you for your wonderful words, Anastasia! Very kind :)

[wordman]

well pouring out your thoughts can never go wrong

[Alice Poésy]

Indeed! Thanks for stopping by!

[wordman]

my pleasure

[V]

A short and enjoyable piece. Simple but expressive use of words. The random thoughts turned into small pieces of art; poems, are the best ones.

[Alice Poésy]

Thank you so much for a wonderful review, Vanessa! I'm glad you enjoyed it :).

[Robert Haigh]

Short, but expressive. Sadness seeps through these words.

[Alice Poésy]

Thank you for your words! Means a lot :)

[Asante]

This was a short and sweetly wonderful piece of work.
Superb imagery! Every line coming together as clearly as they can, painting one hell of a portrait.
I genuinely loved this.
Fantastic work, and I look forward to reading more of your writing! :)

[Alice Poésy]

Thank you so much, this is a wonderful review! Big fan of your work so it means a lot :)

[Asante]

You really are always welcome. :)

[Pushkar Prabhat]

short and effective...........
powerful..........emotional.......
loved it!!!
:)
p.s. about doing it right..........i have no idea.........but this does flow perfectly for me.......

[Alice Poésy]

I can't tell you how much your opinion means to me! Thank you for reading and your lovely words :)

[Pushkar Prabhat]

my pleasure..........!!! :) :)

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Strong imagery. Especially the second half. Nicely written!

[Alice Poésy]

Thank you so much! That's incredibly nice :). Incorporating vivid imagery in my work is something I adore.

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

You're most welcome! Me too. Keep up the good work!

[...]

at poetry is nothing wrong
only what can happen you turn to be strong
you are the beautiful soul
At love and life
all is your and all is for us all

[Alice Poésy]

What a beautiful comment. Thank you for sharing and reading :)

[...]

I AM GLAD YOU LIKE IT. I LIKE YOUR POEM REALY LOT

[Gee]

It is surprising what can inspire us to pen a poem, receipts eh, who'd have thought. Liked this

[Alice Poésy]

Indeed! Thoughts are such strange creatures. Thank you for reading :)

[Wølfy]

Short xD I like short :) means less reading. I like it.

[Alice Poésy]

Haha, I feel you! Long can be stunning but sometimes I feel like short and straight to the point gets the job done too :). Thank you!

[Wølfy]

I just loathe reading and writing xD so short is good for me.