Tin Man

it is such a strange thing to be human

 

 

I hear the rhythm of the rain

wind-whipped drops falling to the ground

Tapping on the old window pane

there's music in that lonesome sound

 

Skipping through the morning shower

daisies covered by mist in dew

Calm and warm so tame with power

life springs forth all fresh and anew

 

Watching the world's sins melt away

gifting life with the chance to be

Feeling the sun light up the day

washing the blues away from me

 

Like the man built solely from tin

with a chest full of broken dreams

The rain falls softly on my skin

nothing quite the way that it seems

 

Watching the clouds that turn to rain

falling on the glass by and by

They run down from the window pane

before the grace of you kneel I

 

Author's Note

Such a metaphor for my own life the tin man. Often I am right as rain. Moments later set by depression and doubt. Then the rain comes washes away the blues and I am fine again. The sun comes up and shines upon me again.All my worries pale in consequence.
Tate

Reviews

[TrimarcoRansome]

Hi Tate, After having a break I find this easier too read...Sometimes when you have been working n your own work it's hard to get into a different rhyme, so my fault not yours! I was going to add to my original comment but it seems it has been deleted?!

[Tate Morgan]

Hi dear. I suppose your trouble with the rhyme is the first stanza the one and only time i can remember using a similar rhyme .

[TrimarcoRansome]

Hi Tate,
Yes I think it is, how about around/round instead of down?

[Tate Morgan]

I like that see what you think

[TrimarcoRansome]

Yes! That is so much easier to read now! Really flows and takes you straight into the rest of it

[Tate Morgan]

thank you you were correct i think

[TrimarcoRansome]

Don't rely on me! do what you think is right, I have been working on several pieces of writing recently and it can get stuck in your head sometimes!

[Tate Morgan]

I like your thoughts and respect your opinion. You are classically educated through the English system .

[Theresa]

Such a creative metaphor. It reminds me that you can have a bad day but another day will come, the sun will rise again. Don't hold onto the bad or you will miss the good. Great poem.

mostly all of us have a tin man.

your author's not reminded me of how breakfast doesn't taste good to me in the morning. it's better late at night, in my opinion. it's like how some things feel wrong when you do them, or a day feels all wrong and you don't know why.

the first stanza is my favorite.

[Rick Puetter]

Dear Tate,

Wonderful poem. And I enjoyed the "Tin Man" theme. Isn't it wonderful that our soul can be refreshed by nature. Simple rain can wash away a world of cares and recharge the spirit, filling the emptiness within.

Greatly enjoyed, Tate.

Best regards,

Rick

[EMW]

I love how you have music as well as pictures with all your poems

[J.Black]

Tate you're a brilliant writer! Great use of the tin man- love this metaphor. Since it's from the Wizard of Oz, ... and the imagery of rain... I almost felt like an essence of innocence reading this! Rusty...but if there was a heart all would be cured!

[Kelley Quinn]

This poem expresses more than just the story of the tin man and his feelings. I agree with your description, it has a metaphor in it. It means so much more than what is down on the paper. Puts the reader into a different perspective of things. Kudos.

[Rain Kissed Secret]

Ah, our equals having to bring us the goods and bad. One minute we are happy, carefree, content in who we are. The next we are as bad as depressed people, wanting to shrivel away and dare not come again.
You caught it magnificently.

I loved your use of my favorite musical! Oh my goodness. You have become my new Oden. Heh, kidding. Great work here Mr. Dad. You hit it spot on.

[Stammers]

There's definatley something in this, personally I preferred to read it without the prompt of the character from Wizard of Oz in mind, but then, in its darkness this poem could be well constrasted and compared with a childhood figure.

Nice work

[little lily Bride of Ch..]

Very Different but once again Great work. i love this line.


As I watch the drops of rain
weave their weary paths and die
They roll down from my window pane
there before the grace of you go I