Better?

a personal pice about hope for a future

Now, I am so much better

Don't feel so depressed

Don't want to hurt no more

Really want to do well

Want to be a designer

And want to help lots of people

 

I want to get some good grades

And go on to do better things

 

Sick of people putting me down

Sick of people doubting me

I'll prove everyone wrong

And be a big success

Reviews

[Blockerswrite]

:) very nice. Something I can very much relate to. You've only got one life to live so go ALL OUT :) Don't give up on your dreams and (sorry for swearing) but F**K naysayers!!! I won't do a rating cos it's not about rating your work, it's about understanding your message and you.

[Allie :)]

I like how you seperated everything :) It's refreshing to see someone fooling around with format!
I can't help but think that the title of this piece is perfectly fitting. It's SO much better.
Although remember that you don't have to start every line with a capital letter-but don't worry about it, because I make that mistake all the time. I've just recently got out of the horrible habit of pressing the "shift" key after the enter key. :)
Keep it up! :)

[Brytt]

First of all: Go for it! I don't care if this is personal or just something that came to you, get yourself out there!

Second: I love how you seperated it- the past, what you want, what you hate. I love that. It really lets you get into how you really feel about it; you're thinking it over, ready to move on, tired of being the failure, right?

Third: A minor thing, but you may want to run a spell-checker on that, or have someone edit it. It's a bother to watch grammer and spelling when you're in a "mood", letting the creativity flow, but, afterwards, show these to friends, get an opinion, have an editor on standby...

...on second thought, that's why it's posted. Well, glad I could help. Take it easy and keep it up!