Blindfolded hand in hand

He had no choice than to take up the task of understanding life itself.

I lived among the children of the lost. With the things I had been through I learned that being alone meant being safe. For years I would keep my walls air tight, strengthening my resolve and seeking solace in my escapes. Though I was forever the scared little boy that lay inside I needed the comfort and sought to fall in love with the dark. And in love with the dark I did fall. But over the years my heart found that the mind didn’t know nearly enough to fuel the kinds of conversations worth what precious little time remain, and thus it begged me to find the heart of another that knew the love, the pain, and the wisdom that my poor mind could only emulate with fragmented pictures of lost. But in being alone and trusting no one but myself for so long, this shell had forgotten how to create the door to invite people in.

 

And so I lived inside the work of my prison until love forced its way into the picture. The purpose of the arrow's bite, as I've come to find, is to overwhelm us with such profound joy that we become helplessly willing to let someone in. To drive our primary intent away from keeping our walls strong and tall, and instead directing our attention toward each other - giving us the wings on our back to help us fly out of our cage.

 

Led up the mountain blindfolded hand in hand we had been brought to the higher tiers of Maslow’s hierarchy, and with the bitter-sweet view of the world below I knew that I’d never be able to climb back down and be as I once was; for the view from the top, in all of its purpose and meaning, is a burden so beautiful that everything else pales in comparison. Being so independent my entire life, I was shaken to find that suddenly I had little choice but to trust someone else, for it was her hand holding mine that kept me from falling asunder. And so I tried as hard as I could with what little I had but alas I was pushed into the pool before I knew how to swim, and so I made the mistake of doing what I've learned to do in my solitude: fly in the face of my fears. Yet so concentrated I grew in not being afraid, that I lost sight that she too was as scared and as ill prepared as I, not yet ready to trust or be trusted. Tunnel vision ate me alive and all I could do was continue the role of fearlessness hoping the storm would clear as I tried to stay on top of a pounding pandora's box.

 

Eventually the storm did pass, but in the fall of the dust I found that I had lost my guide. Suddenly my heart felt empty as it had been stretched by a purpose that no longer existed, and so I struggled to fill it back up again, but mistake after mistake I painfully shed my novice skin as I thumbled chance after chance. I stood cold and scared, and found that though my legs could carry me back down this mountain, my heart couldn’t be as naïve. So with little choice I’ve set camp and begun the work of the cartographer. If I could know how I had gotten here, I would stand the chance of not only finding some sort of peace amidst it's raging cliffs, but of becoming a guide to this rock wiser that I am not blind. However, to understand love is to understand life,  and so I had no choice than to become its pupil and learn its lessons in their enormous grandeur. To give a harsh look and a timid ear towards the entirety of my life thus far and open my eyes completely to what it is I'm being shown each new day.

 

Reviews

[Kara Emily Krantz]

the first couple paragraphs are just great :) love the way you use words.

'we had been brought to the higher tiers of Maslow's hierarchy"
that's great lol i use that referenc a lot, and no one ever gets it haha

beautiful piece. i actually think its even better than i can be aware of at first reading. i'll have to put it in my library for future perusal. :)

lovely job. i loved the perception you have of yourself and the quest to find how you got there...

[dc]

"seeking solice in my escapes". The correct spelling is "solace".
I didn't notice any other spelling errors.

[Starlit Scarlett]

This is very good. I can really relate to the confusion and torn feelings between your character's hope and torment. I love that you found a way to be both logical and deeply introspective at the same time, it's rare to be able to pull that off on philosophy of this scale!